it's CRAZY to be SANE.

Just So You Know

2009-01-13T17:12:00.004+08:00

Ayaw ko ng may kahati.

You can't have the best of both worlds. I'm giving you space so you can think clearly. If it's me, then it's me. If it's not me, then it's not me. Simple. It's your call.

Chocnut? Hun? Imy? Hug? Kiss? What the heck?! If you're just giving me the wrong signals, JUST QUIT IT. How insensitive can you get? Don't toy with my emotions. You're hurting me so much. Paasa ka. :(

Kung kelan bumibigay na ako sa yo, saka ka pa naging ganyan. Hay.

Xoxo,
Karen

Random Thoughts

2008-12-29T02:05:00.004+08:00

What I don't know won't ~~hurt~~ affect me.

Ugh. It's like a drug. It's in my system. It's eating me up. I'm addicted.

Why can't I have ~~what~~ who I want?

That's what I hate from being a girl. I always have to wait for a guy to take the initiative. Err.

When will I see/hear from you again?

That night was almost perfect.

It seemed as if we've known each other for years.

That easiness.

That comfort.

I wonder, do you ever think of me?

'Cause I do.

I do think of you.

Almost always.

Haay.

My phone beeps.

I'm hoping it's you.

NOT.

*Disappointment fills the air*

I'm waiting.

Still waiting.

Tick tock.

Xoxo,
Karen

Fleeting

2008-12-28T01:16:00.002+08:00

I thought what we had was special. I thought we were going to last longer.

Xoxo,
Karen

On Forgiveness

2008-12-05T09:41:00.004+08:00

Forgive or forget. That's what they say. It's good advice but it's not very practical. When someone hurts us, we want to hurt them back. When someone wrongs us we want to be right. Without forgiveness, old scores never settle. Old wounds never heal and the most we can hope for is that someday we'll be lucky enough to forget. - Meridith Grey

Don't you just love Meridith Grey? She always leaves us with something to think about.

***

I want to forgive and forget. I want to forgive you. And I want to forget you.

This has been my way of thinking everytime I get hurt. I'm aware of the fact that having grudges and bitterness won't do me any good and so I figured that since it's almost Christmas, it's time to do some reflecting. [But of course, it's not only during the Christmas season that reflecting should be done. It must be done as necessary or as often as possible. :)]

To forgive and to forget are two different things. To forgive is to loosen your grip to the negative vibes that caused you to be hurt or offended by anyone and lead you to more positive aspects of your life, while to forget is to remove that memory in your mind. It's hard to forgive but it's almost always necessary. Sure the things that have caused us to be hurt or offended may be part of our lives already, but forgiveness lessens the weight that we have to carry, and it is capable of making us feel at peace. If someone hurts us, we shouldn't hurt them back, instead we should hold them more closely in our hearts and forgive them sincerely even before they're sorry for what they did. We won't be able to move on and fully attain happiness if we don't know how to practice forgiveness. I guess forgiveness is one of the keys to achieve eternal bliss.

We can hold on to anger, bitterness, resentment, vengeance OR embrace forgiveness and move forward. You decide. Think about it. ;)

Happy holidays!

Xoxo,

Karen

So many things to do, so little time

2008-12-03T20:11:00.008+08:00

I've got TONS of things to do. I really need enough strength and motivation to be able to accomplish all of them. I'll be taking the NMAT on the 14th of December. Pray for me, everyone! I haven't reviewed yet. I know, right? I'm supposed to apply whatever I've learned in the previous years. Yeye. But what can I do? I don't have that stock knowledge. I guess, STUCK knowledge suits me better. Ohwell. Chemistry, Physics, Biology? Their my weaknesses! How ironic, right? I'm applying for Medicine, and Science is my weakness. 11 days to go. I need a miracle to be able to get a high grade or a passing score at that. *Sigh* Good Lord, help me.

Moving on, my mom is on a long vacation, and she gave me the responsibility to take over our business. It's keeping me really busy recently. I talked to my mom on the phone and she gave me A LOT of instructions regarding the new water system/pipe construction in our neighborhood. She told me to do this, to do that, etc. It was really draining! It hasn't started yet, I mean, the new water system/pipe construction, but I know that it'll really test my patience. I hope that it turns out just fine. I'm keeping my fingers crossed! I don't want to let my mom down. Brr.

I'm officially 6 months and 1 day BUM. Still unemployed. *Sigh* It's not that I have to fret so bad about it because I haven't applied to any of the hospitals yet 'cause most of them are still on a FREEZE hiring mode. However, there are a few hospitals which are currently open for hiring, but they're just far away. It's not like I'm not after the experience. Of course, I'm dying to apply my Nursing skills in a hospital setting once again. But my mom doesn't approve of the idea of renting a house or an apartment where I can stay while I'm on training/at work. Haay. I REALLY really ReALLy want to work already.

What else? Okay, so it's 4 months and so so days since the release of the PNLE June 2008. I already received my eligibility to take the NCLEX a month ago, but I haven't taken the next step yet 'cause I have to find the perfect review center for me since studying on my own won't, in my opinion, be effective.

Argh. These are just a few of the many things I have to do within 3-4 months. I'm hoping, wishing & praying that everything will just go on smoothly.

Xoxo,

Karen

Cut me some slack

2008-12-03T19:23:00.000+08:00

I couldn't stop my tears from falling. So many things to do, so little time. Err. Physically & emotionally draininggg.

One.Step.At.A.Time.

Xoxo,

Karen

Edward Cullen

2008-11-28T12:28:00.000+08:00

I'm unconditionally & irrevocably inlove with him.

This is actually my fave scene - Edward, with his shades on, getting out of the car, opening the door for Bella, walking with her while everyone else was staring, and then putting his arm around Bella's neck. *Kilig!*

I also loved the baseball scene and the part when Edward said to Bella: You're my personal brand of heroine. *Kilig!*

I must say that the book is way better than the movie, though it didn't suck that much. Nevertheless, it was worth watching for. :)

Xoxo,

Karen

Just A Thought

2008-11-28T12:20:00.000+08:00

I remember my sister warning me that I shouldn't fall for his words (or actions at that) and that I should always keep in mind what he did to me a few years back. What he did to me was foul and if he did it to me once, he can always do it to me again for sure.

I know that this is kind of difficult to handle. Especially now that I'm starting to get attached to him again. But I guess it's just a matter of knowing my limits and having self-control. I have to control myself from falling inlove with him all over again. *sigh*

I don't want to have my heart be broken over the same person twice. Or thrice for this matter.

Xoxo,

Karen

IMYH <3

2008-11-24T19:40:00.000+08:00

You keep me sane. :)

Please don't let me down this time. You have my trust. Don't blow it.

Xoxo,
Karen

Webcam

2008-11-24T19:20:00.000+08:00

Me loving the webcam to pieces. :)

I am missing my mum & sister so much. Ate Trina & I were in tears upon seeing my Mum and Ate Kathy on screen. We just missed them terribly! We aren't used to being far away from each other, that's why. My Mum also cried for seeing the two of us crying. Haha. Cause & effect, huh? Haha. Ate Kathy was constantly showing off the things they bought for us just to stop our tears from falling down. She was succesful for our tears were turned to laughter & smiles. Haha. I am so thrilled for the goodies!!! But I'm so much more thrilled to see and be with my mum again soon. I love you & I miss you, Ma.

Xoxo,
Karen

My Sentiments

2008-11-16T01:46:00.000+08:00

It's almost 2 in the morning and I'm still wide awake. Well, that's not new. I just finished having a conversation with my sister through YM. I missed her so much. It has been weeks since the last time we had a long conversation. That's why I'm truly grateful that YM exists for it makes the distance between us kind of shorter. Yay. Thanks for the built-in webcam, too. I felt like my sister's just in the next room. Haha. I must say that being far from the person you love makes you realize their worth. Absence, indeed, makes the heart grow fonder.

Anyway, I just couldn't sleep yet without sharing with you what my friend posted on her Facebook. It goes:

We must not settle for a lukewarm lover and mild happiness. For deep down we know that lukewarm will turn cold and mild happiness will become a nameless sadness.

True enough. After reading this, I've come to realize that we should not settle for anything less than we deserve, because we deserve better, if not the best. I've been contemplating about this for several days already, and I figured that even if he says he likes me and all that mush in the world, but still remains inconsistent, he doesn't deserve the best of me, and will never do unless of course he proves himself worthy of my trust, of my love. Actions speak louder than words, ya know. I hope he's aware of that.

For the record, I F-ing hate expecting a text message upon waking up and before closing my eyes when I'm about to sleep, and a reply for long hours only to find out that I was just waiting for nothing. Ugh. Pero pag ako, reply agad. Wtf. Having too much expections really is disappointing. Demmit. Well, it's time to get some Zzzz's. Rihanna & Chris Brown's concert is just a few hours away. Yay. Take a Bow.

Xoxo,

Karen

My Shining Star

2008-11-13T22:07:00.002+08:00

I missed that feeling. I feel like I'm in high school again. Yay. I'm savoring the moment while it lasts. Imy. :) :) :)

Xoxo,

Karen

CRAP

2008-11-02T00:31:00.000+08:00

Men do it for the thrill. When they don't get caught, they feel invincible.

Xoxo,

Karen

Rihanna & Chris Brown in Manila

2008-10-25T21:48:00.000+08:00

11.16.08

Yeahuh! :)

Q&A

2008-10-24T19:05:00.000+08:00

1.Did anything brighten up your day today?
~ Yeps. His good morning message. As always :)
.
2.How are you feeling at this exact moment?
~ Somnolent & bored.
.
3.Are you someone who worries too often?
~ Yeps! I worry too much. And I hate it. Ugh.
.
4.What is one thing that is currently bothering you?
~ People I don't like. Haha. I know, right? I should get rid of the negative vibes. But there just some people who are too annoying that just cannot be ignored.
.
5.What did you do today?
~ Well, nothing productive actually. Took a bath, ate my late lunch, went online, slept for like 3 hours, and went online (again). Ugh. I feel so lazy. I don't know why.
.
6.Who did you last talk to in person?
~ Ate Trina. Just a few minutes ago. She has always been one of my "outlets" whenever I feel like having a brat attack. Haha.
.
7.Does anyone love you?
~ Of course. I'm sure my Mum does. Haha.

8.Is heartbreak really as bad as it sounds?
~ Yes. Too bad. Heartbreaks have never really been so easy to bear. I should know, I've had enough.
.
9.How was your evening?
~ Hmm. So ordinary.
.
11.Do you read your horoscopes daily?
~ Just as often as I can. Haha. I love horoscopes. They give me the thrills.
.
12.Is there happiness behind your smile?
~ Of course. :)
.
13.Can you control your tears?
~ I try to but I end up losing my control. Haha. I'm very sensitive. I cry at the movies, or even just when someone says something really moving.
.
14.How many pictures do you have?
~ A LOT. I'm a camera magnet. Haha.
.
15.Do you get a lot of comments on them?
~ Just enough, I guess.
.
16.What's your current profile song?
~ Bottle It Up on Friendster. Miss Independent on Multiply. Ever the Same on Blogger.
.
17.Do you ever search for old friends?
~ Yes. I'd like to be in touch with them.
.
18.How do you make your money?
~ By asking for it. Haha. I'm still unemployed. *Sigh*
.
19.Who was the last person you yelled at?
~ Hmm. My sister? Just because I was so effing pissed off.
.
20.Does the last person to put their arms around you mean anything?
~ Hmm. Can't even remember who the last person was.
.
21.Why did you last cry?
~ Because of Proposal Daisakusen (Operation Love)! It's a major tearjerker!
.
22.Do you miss someone?
~ Yeps. All the time.
.
23.Who do you want to see right now?
~ Ate Kathy. She's in Illinois right now.
.
24.Did you hear that prostitution was the world's oldest profession?
~ I thought so. Haha. But what the heck. I don't really care.
.
25.Who can you just hang out with and just talk about stuff?
~ Loads of people. Jerks & HS kada.
.
26.Do you find life too difficult at times?
~ Yes. To the point that I get so emotional.
.
27.Do you talk to the person who posted this before you?
~ I used to. When we had our duty together at San Martin Ward.
.
28.Who was the last person you had a conversation with and what about?
~ Ate Trina. We talked about what's bothering us lately.
.
29.Are you keeping a secret from someone who needs to know the truth?
~ Yes. *Guilty!*
.
30.Is there any meaning behind your profile song?
~ I guess. The lyrics remind me of someone.
.
31.Do you believe what goes around comes around?
~ Yes. I'm afraid of karma. Yikes.
.
32.Are you a lover or a fighter?
~ A lover.
.
33.Has anyone been disappointed in you recently?
~ Maybe. Haha.
.
34.Would you rather your partner have gorgeous eyes or a gorgeous smile?
~ Both. Haha. I go for gorgeous eyes. I've always been a sucker for gorgeous eyes!
.
35.Has anyone ever told you they want to spend the rest of their life with you?
~ Yes. My ex. Haha.
.
36.What's your favorite song by the Spice Girls?
~ Wanna be!
.
37.Are you the kind of person that stands up for them?
~ Stands up for?
.
38.What do you do in your spare time?
~ Drown in cyberspace. Haha.
.
39.What is holding you back from going out with the person you like?
~ My conscience. Haha.
.
40.What is the cutest thing a guy/girl has said to you lately?
~ "Suckao? Ahaha.. Mis u *insert name*! Gudmorning." *smiles*

Xoxo,

Karen

Addicted

2008-10-23T13:14:00.000+08:00

I'm addicted to Proposal Daisakusen Operation Love.

I was able to finish episodes 1-5 yesterday. It really made me burst into tears! 7 episodes to go. Yay. :)

Xoxo,
Karen

Make it easy on me...

2008-10-21T07:26:00.000+08:00

... Will you? *Sigh*

It was a long weekend.

Friday
Printed more pictures for my birthday present for Janelle. Met up with Keeme at Jollibee. Hmm. May ka holding hands?! HULI! Haha! Went to the Cityland & Pasong Tamo Tower with a super friend. Rained real hard. Got semi-stranded. Read the horoscope (Super sakto I'm telling you! Haha.) Walked 'til we reach Greenbelt 1. More walks. Haha. Ate early dinner at John & Yoko, GB5. Glorietta. Park Square. Went home. It was such a lovely day! 7 hours of laughter and smiles! :)

Saturday
Stayed at home 'til 1am. My cousins and I went to White Avenue because we were bored. Haha. Good thing Ria was there. Time to partayyy!

Sunday
Went to Trinoma. Ate dinner at Fish & Co. Had dessert at Cafe Breton. Happy Happy!

Monday
Went to 168 Mall. Tiring yet fun! Had dinner at Cantina. Chilled at Starbucks. Cocktail drinks at Dapo (Somewhere along Abs-cbn). Sooo fun! My mom & titas are just so cool! We drank WITH them! Coolness! 'Til next time!

Xoxo,
Karen

Feeling Lonely

2008-10-15T02:39:00.000+08:00

It's still the month of October but I can't help but think about what would my Christmas & New Year be like without the two most important people in my life. I'll be spending the holidays with my sister. Yeah, just the two of us. It's not that I don't want to, but I just feel lonely knowing that the holiday season won't be the same as before. Back when we're celebrating it together. Back when we're complete. *Sigh*

Btw, I am so loving this song! It makes me want to reminisce the good ol' times.

Just let me hold you while you're falling apart

Just let me hold you so we both fall down

Fall on me

Tell me everything you want me to be

Forever with you forever in me

Ever the same

Xoxo,

Karen

W-H-A-T-E-V-E-R, Bitch!

2008-10-14T14:01:00.000+08:00

You always think that you're BEAUTIFUL.

Oh please. You ANNOY me oh so well well well.

Don't push your luck too much. I can be ANNOYING too, sucker.

HAHAHAHA :)

Xoxo,
Karen

Finally

2008-10-09T18:31:00.000+08:00

I've been thinking about the "answer" to my so-called love problem. And just when I felt like surrendering, came my sister telling me: Wag ka na dyan. Wala ka namang mapapala dyan eh. You guys are not progressing.

Tada!

It's the answer I've been looking for all along.

I just blurted out: Oo nga noh? Kung naging tubig pa, STAGNANT.

My Ate Trina nodded to show her approval and uttered: Magkakasakit ka lang dyan.

I looked at her with dismay, and then she added: Stagnant, eh?

Haha. Double meaning.

Oh shit. It hit me so hard.

Now I know the reason why I lack the motivation to reply to his text messages. It's simply the fact that we are NOT progressing. We're in the same stage everyday. There's nothing new. Nothing special. Blah blah blah. I can't stand being in a situation like this. I mean, it can't be like this forever, right? I have no assurance. I have no control. I have nothing to hang on to. I cannot demand. I cannot argue. I cannot expect. Argh. Hate it.

Show me some light.

Xoxo,
Karen

IHB

2008-10-09T07:18:00.000+08:00

We're slowly drifting apart.

I can feel it.

It's too obvious not to notice it.

That certain "spark" is diminishing.

Another heartache.

Another heartbreak.

I suppose. :(

Xoxo,
Karen

Celebration/s

2008-10-05T18:43:00.000+08:00

I had my post birthday celebration at Burgoo with Mara and Mega. We watched Mirrors after that and headed straight to BedScene to chill.

Mara was forced to treat us because I told her that she doesn't have a birthday gift for me yet. Haha! We ordered a pitcher of Green-minded & onion rings. Loved it! Thanks, Mara, for the treat! You're the best! *smoochies* :)

My family, along with Raymund, went to Gerry's Grill, Bluewave, to attend Allen & Alvin's graduation party. They both graduated Civil Engineering in DLSU, Allen as Cum Laude and Alvin as Summa Cum Laude. Woah. I'm truly proud of what they've achieved through the years! I've known them since highschool, with much dedication, passion and hardwork, I really had no doubts that they're going to finish College with flying colors. Moving on, there were a lot of people there. The food was delicious. I was so full! There was even a band to make the party even more merry. :)

While I was there in party, I've realized several things. One of which is the fact that you don't know what you've got 'til it's gone. And I remember receiving a quote that says: Never ignore the person who loves you, cares for you, and misses you. Because one day, you may wake up from your sleep and realize that you've lost the moon, while counting the stars.

O-H W-E-L-L. Catch my drift.

Xoxo,
Karen

A Day To Remember

2008-10-04T15:05:00.000+08:00

Chai and I went to the Megatrade Hall 3 for the 2nd Pinoy Nurse Expo 2008. We paid P100 for tons of leaflets. Haha. It wasn't worth it. We didn't stay long because John J (Chai's friend) arrived. We had our super late lunch at Sbarro. As usual, I ordered Baked Ziti and Rasberry Iced Tea. I missed Sbarro! The last time I ate there was during our NCMH days. I was with my RLE then. :)

It was my first time to meet John J. I've heard so many good things about him, and when I've finally met him, I've come to realize that he's more than what I've expected him to be. :) He's super nice! He even thought of eating dessert at The Old Spaghetti House as his birthday treat/surprise for me. See? That was just our "first" meeting. It's just too bad that he'll be leaving for the United States (for good) on Monday already. Aww.

He drove us home. I slept for like 3 hours. Did my usual thing--go online, watch my Kapamilya teleseryes, and text. Haha. Well, that's about it for now.

By the way, I hate liars. Err. Just thought about it.

Xoxo,
Karen

Sigh

2008-10-03T16:20:00.000+08:00

Life is too short to stress yourself with people who don't even deserve to be an issue in your life.

Xoxo,
Karen

Happy BEE Day!

2008-10-03T08:13:00.000+08:00

I just turned 22 yesterday. I know, right? I'm old. I feel old. Haha!

My cellphone started beeping even a couple of hours before the clock reached 12 midnight. There were a lot of people who remembered my birthday. Yay! Thanks to Cla & Ria (I suppose), for reminding our friends to greet me on my special day! I know them too well, and they know I'll be delighted to receive A LOT of text messages. Haha!

I started my birthday with a simple prayer in my room. I thanked God for all the blessings I've received for the past 21 years and for giving me another year to live. :)

These are the things that made my birthday worth remembering:

Cla and Ria asked me to go online at 12 midnight. Cla's surprise was truly touching! It made me cry, especially when I came across Joef's message. Joef and I have been friends since First Year College, and from then on, we have shared wonderful and bittersweet memories together. I remember confiding to him my rants and raves about Chris, the love of my life then. I always feel at ease whenever I talk to him. It seems as if he always has mood to listen, pieces of advice to share, and comfort to give. No wonder why he knows almost everything about my past lovelife. It's just so sad that he is already in the United States, and I know that it wouldn't be as easy as texting him out of the blue just because I have an update or so. But I know that this distance is just temporary. We'll get to see each other soon, and hopefully by then I'd get to introduce him to "THE ONE FOR ME." :)

My ex-boyfriend and I exchanged text messages for about 5 hours last night. I must admit that I missed him (a litlle.. a little too much..) but I'm guessing that it's just a normal feeling. I mean, we haven't seen and heard from each other for a couple of months already, so I have every right to miss him, right? Haha! Well well well, I owe him 22 burgers! Yikes. He must grow bigger than ever after that! Haha!

I had dinner with my mom, Ate Trina, Ate Trina's friends Ruff & Abby, Nick, Tita Zynn and Allen at John & Yoko, Greenbelt 5. Alvin missed it because he has a "visitor" so to say that he can't leave behind. Err. I feel so bad that he had to miss this special event just for that girl. It has been a routine or an SOP that everyone should be present on each other's birthday. Err. On a happy note, Tita Zynn & Allen gave me a chic dress and a CD (Renditions of Love Songs). I soooo love my dress! I'll wear it come November, my next vacation to Bohol. :) Anyway, I loved the food that I ordered (Ikay Fry and Japanese Fried Rice) and the Dalandan Iced Tea (Color blue). It was very hip! The waiters even sang Happy Birthday to me. They were really funny because there were two versions of the song--the serious one and the joyful one. I was reacting so bad when they were singing the serious one, but when they sang the joyful one, I was laughing so hard! Their voice and their facial expressions were truly delightful! Haha! Thanks, John & Yoko crew, for the dessert and for the entertainment. :) I'll definitely go eat there again soon!

After dinner, we headed straight to the EGI. My heart was throbbing for I was nervous that I'd get to see Alvin and the so-called visitor there. I actually did. After an hour or so. How awkward. Allen was looking at me once in awhile just to see how will I react. Haha! Funny. :) But it was really awkward.

I received an LBC delivery from Janelle at around 12:30 in the afternoon. I was really surprised! My mom even cried after reading Janelle's birthday message for me. Haha! It was really touching! She also gave me a gift certificate at Kamiseta. Aww. How sweet! I'll go to the mall in awhile and will probably use it already! Yay! I love you, Janelle! :)

I really feel so blessed to know that thorugh these years, I STILL have my family and friends with me in this wonderful journey called LIFE. :)

Xoxo,
Karen

It Has Been A While

2008-10-01T12:24:00.000+08:00

Yes, it has REALLY been awhile since the last time I posted an entry here. There were a lot [and i really mean A LOT] of things that happened while I was away from LJ/Blogspot.

Yesterday, Pey, Chi, Cla and I met at 7/11 Dapitan and headed straight to PRC to get our Certificate of Passing and Certificate of Rating. After that, I asked Pey to accompany me to the mall to buy a picture frame for Cla. We went back to school to gather my pictures with Cla for I was planning on giving her a Photo Mosaic. It was a rush gift, but definitely worth it! I'm glad she loved it!

Later that night, I had my prebirthday celebration with Cla at Josefina Garden Grill and Restaurant.

I was really pleased to see my beloved friends there. I was semi-surprised to see him, sitting and waiting for me to arrive. It was suppose to be a "surprise" according to him but then he arrived earlier than me. Haha. I really did appreciate the effort and all. We all know that he just had an operation about a week ago, and even if he wasn't permitted by his mom to come to our birthday celebration, he still did, and i did appreciate it. If only I could tell him straight to his face that it meant so much to me. If only. Argh. I am such a coward. Err. Anyway, he left a little early, around 9:30 in the evening, but it was all good because what really mattered to me most was his presence. :) Cheesy. Haha.

I remember two Sundays ago, we were exchanging text messages and he said that his tummy was aching. It was neither nangangasim nor nanghihilab. I told him to go visit a doctor just so he can be seen/examined. Later that night, I was taken aback when he told me that he'll be confined and will be scheduled for appendectomy the following day. It was all happening so fast.

I was planning on surprising him in the hospital. I sent a text message to our common friends a day before we visited him, and even bought a get well soon card that says: Well, well, well... Soon, soon, soon! plus a Smorse cake at Red Ribbon, three balloons [could mean many things! Haha!], and a pink stressball for he was really in pain.

We went to his room, surprised him, got ourselves updated with the latest chikas and suddenly, this girl arrived. She opened the door wide enough to hit my left shoulder. She stared at me but didn't say sorry. A simple sorry could have been enough. Err. She was acting like she owns the room--opening the refrigerator, changing the channel on the TV [from Abs-cbn to GMA. Err.], and so much more. It really pissed the hell out of me. Show some respect, will you? Your name sounds like bitch. And so are you. Err.

It was an awkward situation. Really. Especially when we both know that we had a semi-hot conversation about 3 weeks ago. She told me not to tell the boy that she called me up. As obedient as I am, I didn't tell the boy about it for I was afraid that it would only cause trouble and make things even more complicated. But hey, if you ever try calling me or texting me again, I'll definitely have no second thoughts on telling him what you have been saying to me. Err. I just want to let this out. I am just effing pissed!

Enough about that. On a happy note, I'll be turning 22 tomorrow. Ugh. Time flies so fast. I am currently having mixed emotions. I'm happy because it's going to be my special day, meaning, my rules, my day, that kind of thing. I'd get to make a wish [I've been waiting for this moment! Haha!] and I'd get to receive birthday greetings and gifts [hopefully! Haha!] from my family and friends--the old and the new. Yay. What makes me kind of anxious is the fact that I'm expecting too much from my birthday, and I know that if tomorrow's happenings won't meet my expectations, I'll just feel disappointed. :( So what's a girl to do? Don't expect. Just don't. Err. It's easier said than done. Sigh. Hope everything turns out perfectly tomorrow, my birthday... my special day. :)

I received a text message from my ex-boyfriend just now. He told me that he couldn't wait for 12midnight to wish me a happy birthday. In fairness, he remembered. :)

Xoxo,
Karen

Clik the following links to view the pictures:
http://kareneenuh.multiply.com/photos/album/322
http://kareneenuh.multiply.com/photos/album/323

Err

2008-08-15T03:49:00.000+08:00

Paasa ka.

Xoxo,
Karen

Hany

2008-08-08T03:23:00.000+08:00

I am missing you badly.

Sh*t. I am so corny. ;p

Xoxo,
Karen

Hey Mr.

2008-08-02T14:34:00.000+08:00

DO NOT FEIGN AFFECTION.

Enough said.

Wait...

So what if I like you?

Does that give you the right to play with my heart?

You are such a FLIRT...

And I am such a STUPID girl.

CRAP.

Xoxo,
Karen

Thank you, Lord!!! :)

2008-07-25T18:23:00.000+08:00

Karen M. Sison, RN

FINALLY!

ILOVEYOU,LORD!

Xoxo,
Karen

Tick Tock

2008-07-21T17:37:00.000+08:00

Waiting.

It's really making me anxious. Ugh. I don't like this feeling.

I hope it's gonna be worth all the wait. I'm keeping my fingers crossed.

Dear God, help me.

Xoxo,

Karen

Rainy Day

2008-07-17T14:21:00.000+08:00

My friends and I were supposed to go to Trinoma today but we had to reschedule it due to the rain.

I slept for like 15 hours. The weather's just perfect to laze around. I love the cool breeze and the sound of the pouring rain. If it wasn't for my sister waking me up, I would have loved to sleep more.

We're probably gonna watch Dark Knight tomorrow. Yay! Hope to see more of 4-9 this time. I'm not really sure if I'll be seeing him tomorrow. I have this feeling that we aren't as close as before anymore. It's like there's a line drawn between us now. Am I just paranoid or what? Sigh. I just hope that our friendship won't go to waste. I mean, I love being friends with him. He's like one of my closest boy friends ever. He really matters to me more than anyone could ever imagine. Oh well.

4 days to go until the judgment day. Oh my goodness. Just the though of it makes my heart beat so fast and my bowel sounds become hyperactive. No kidding. It makes me wanna sit still and reflect. I need your help, Lord.

Xoxo,

Karen

Alarm Clock

2008-07-14T19:19:00.000+08:00

You asked me to wake you up at 2:30am.

I asked you why/what for but you didn't reply.

Just so you know, I'm still wide awake now.

Time check: 3:30am.

I just want to say that I did try calling you up 5x...

...but the line was busy.

Can't help but think.

Analyze.

Overanalyze.

I guess it's really not meant to be.

Oh well.

Tata!

Xoxo,
Karen

The Aftermath

2008-07-13T18:01:00.000+08:00

Renz's happy BEERday was a blast! Had so much fun! The food (c/o Mang Tootz) was delicious. Thanks, Larry, for the chocolate fondue! I loved it! It was my favorite actually. :) There were a lot of drinks. The music was cool. The people were just all happy and up to something really fun. It was one helluva night!!! :)

I was kind of disappointed though to see someone I never expected to see there. I mean, it was really an awkward situation. We had an issue for about a month ago, and we haven't settled things formally yet. But thanks to gran matador, for it gave me the courage to face her. It was really surprising because when she was about to leave, I appoached her, hugged her, and apologized sincerely. I was a little dizzy that time, but I remember her saying that it's okay. What I failed to hear was her "I'm sorry too." It could've been better if she also apologized for what she did to me. Besides, it takes two to tango, right? She was at fault too. Grr. But I don't regret saying sorry to her though because I feel lighter now, and that's what matters. I don't want to feel annoyed anymore. I just want peace, with anyone and anything for that matter.

Anyway, listening to iPod with him has always been kilig. *smiles* It makes me love the songs which I used to not like just because he listens to them. I remember telling him to download the songs of Boyce Avenue, but he said he wasn't interested, and so I dropped the issue already. Much to my surprise, when he was right beside me that night, he handed me the earphone and played a song. It was a song by Boyce Avenue. I must admit that he really made my heart melt. He said he won't download it, but he did. I know it may not be a big deal for some, but for me it's something worth to be appreciated for. Lying down in bed with just one pillow supporting our heads while playing the music we both like made the atmosphere even more heaven-ish. Grr. I hate how much he makes me feel really weak inside. Too bad he got drunk too early, that's why I wasn't able to feel his presence that much. *sigh* Nevertheless, it was all good since I was able to take care of him, in my own little way. He deserved to be taken cared of, because he took care of me when I was drunk before. It was my chance of paying him back. :)

I love overnight parties! Renz's party is, most likely, the most memorable party I've ever attended because aside from the fact that there were a lot of people who came (a total of 22) and a lot of people got wasted, including the person who dazzles me, who has been constantly telling me that he never gets drunk, the boyfriends of my friends came over early in the morning to take their girlfriends home. There could have been a fight, if it wasn't prevented. Whew. Yes, the party was really fab but I never imagined it would turn out that way--outsiders getting involved with my friends.

Another highlight of the night was seeing my friends making out, with my other friends watching them. I know it's not something I should dwell on too much, since they are both of legal age, single, and it's a free country so they can do whatever they want, but I just couldn't believe my eyes! It was really a shocking experience for me. It was my first time to witness such a scene. I guess I should be mature enough to accept the fact that such a thing really happens in real life, and I should deal with it.

I'm so looking forward to sharing more wonderful memories with my friends. I'm really glad that even if we're no longer classmates, we stil managed to take some time off, to get together again, and to booze the night away! Sa uulitin, definitely!!! :)

Pictures I: http://kareneenuh.multiply.com/photos/album/280/-_Happy_BEERday_Renz_-_1112.07.08

Pictures II: http://kareneenuh.multiply.com/photos/album/281/-_Friday_Night_-

Xoxo,

Karen

Thursday

2008-07-11T15:47:00.000+08:00

Chai and I went to St. Jude at around 11am. Went home. Watched Game KNB?, Wowowee, Ligaw na Bulaklak (Yes, I am super enjoying that show! HAHA It's getting more and more intense I should say!), and then I fell asleep in the sofa. It has always been like this since my vacation started. I've always loved siestas. Even if I was still going to school, lectures after lunch would always make me feel sleepy. I even take having lunch for granted, just so I can use my 1-hour-lunch break to sleep/laze around. I guess that explains my figure. HAHA.

I went online, as usual. I've said to myself that I won't stalk anymore. I wanted to believe that what I don't know won't hurt me, but like what Paulo Coelho said, "not knowing is the worst kind of feeling." Besides, stalking once in awhile won't kill. *wink* And so I did my usual "stalking." Much to my surprise, a simple "hun" made me laugh. Naman, originality pwede? HAHA. Doesn't he feel awkward when his girl calls him hun? I mean, duh, that was one of our terms of endearment. It just sounds so crazy. Oh c'mon!!! And this other boy in my past, a highschool sweetheart I should say, is still not over his exgirlfriend. Oh well, that's too bad. It's just an opinion though. His comments on his exgirlfriend's site just made me think so.

On a higher note, a close friend made me happy today. What's new? He always makes my day. I always have a good laugh and a bright smile whenever I talk to him, or when we're just together, or even just the thought of him. My family and friends would even notice it. They say that I am too obvious that I like him. It shows daw. Golly. This is such a crazy/beautiful feeling. I hate it sometimes though because it makes me too vunerable. Grr. I feel like I'm still in highschool. You know, the peak stage wherein you get so attracted to an opposite sex, and it's all up to you if you nurse the feeling, let it grow, let it show, let your emotions get the better of you, or just don't do anything at all. But this time, it's a little more complicated. I must keep in mind that there's a line I shouldn't cross until the right time comes. So now, it's best to just ignore the feeling and stay as friends. *sigh*

Anyway, what happened last night was just so unexpected. A friend asked me a question which obviously made me burst into laughter. Until now, I couldn't believe that he actually asked me that certain question. It's just so funny, and annoying at the same time. Too bad, I've kind of liked him pa naman until last night. I must admit that he's physically attractive (who am I to resist his good looks and charm?), musically inclined (pogi points indeed!), has good leadership skills (NCBS officer ba naman), and into sports (wow! What more can I ask for?). He's totally an IT boy, but too bad, his question made me forget all the good traits he possesses. Hmm. I'm being a perfectionist once again. Grr. Well, it's never too let for him to redeem himself. Oh c'mon. Make me like you once more. *laughs*

Pardon the flight of ideas. :) It's just that there are a lot of things I want to say but I'm just having a hard time organizing my thoughts now. They are all over my head, and it makes me go crazy thinking about these stuffs all at the same time! HAHA ;p

And oh, before I forget, tomorrow is the big night. Looks like there are a lot of people coming but still it ain't enough because who I want to see and be with on that special night won't probably make it. Boohoo. Nevertheless, I hope the party turns out fab! What shall I wear? Dress? Top + shorts/skirt/pants? Still undecided. I don't want to look under/overdressed naman diba? HAHA ;p'Til then! Tata!

Xoxo,
Karen

S/p DT

2008-07-10T14:14:00.000+08:00

DT stands for Delaying Tactics. We use this term whenever we feel like doing something else rather than focusing or finishing an important agenda. We so love DTs! Basta DT, game kami! HAHA ;p

Janelle, Pey, Kate, Chino and I went to Robinson's Place, Midtown wing, to go see a movie and eat. For a change. We ate at Wham! Burgers, accompanied Pey at Sanfo treats for he wanted to buy something for AP, and then we watched Hancock already. Although Pey informed us about how the movie's going to end (I know, right? He's such a spoiler! HAHA), we still chose to watch it anyway. In return, I had to tell him the twist of Wanted because he hasn't seen that movie yet. HAHA ;p Truce?

Personally, it wasn't really a great movie. I think it's overrated. The effects were amazing, but the story, in terms of substance, was lesser as I've expected it to be. The latter part of the movie was just so predictable. Nevertheless, it was worth our P130 bucks.

It was my second time to watch a movie at Midtown. The first time was watching Sakal, Sakali, Saklolo with my mom. The moviehouse is just so nice. It has comfy seats, good sound system, and it doesn't smell bad like the other moviehouses I've been to! HAHA ;p But this time, I was kind of disappointed because Cinema 1 of Midtown is smaller. There are only 7 rows, having 20 seats per row, more or less. I really felt dizzy and nauseated since the screen was too close. So I had to close my eyes once in awhile just so the feeling will be lessened, if not totally eradicated. Err.

Overall, our DT today was a fruitful one. I super missed my RLE mates to bits! That's why I really savored our moment together. It could have been more fun if we were complete though -- the 12 of us -- but I guess that's just not possible, atleast at the moment.

'Til next time! (Yay! I'll be seeing them once again this Friday! Happy Birthday, Renz!!! Another night of booze!)

For more pictures: http://kareneenuh.multiply.com/photos/album/279/-_Power_of_5_-_09.07.08_

Xoxo,
Karen

Pfft

2008-07-10T02:59:00.000+08:00

Five entires for a day? Woah. I am such a bum.

I was supposed to go to the NBI with a friend today. Have to process my fingerprint card and get an NBI clearance for my NCLEX application. I was all set when she told me that she was still in bed, lazing around. Grr. I really hate last-minute-backouts. "I'm sorry" is getting old. Ohwell. I'm pissed off, which I think is just a natural reaction, but since she's one of my close friends, I just can't afford to get mad at her or to stay pissed off for too long.

Anyway, my RLE mates and I decided to go to the movies later. We're going to watch Hancock, most definitely. I just can't wait! I've seen the trailer and it seems really interesting. Yay! But Pey had seen it already. Boohoo. Will he watch it again with us? I have yet to find out. (But I'm really hoping he will since there are no other movies I'd want to watch other than Hancock. Waa.) Tata!

Xoxo,
Karen

Infatuation

2008-07-09T17:27:00.000+08:00

They say that a stolen glance is the oldest trick we know, yet it's definitely the most obvious sign that you like that person.

Could this be true?

Well then, I'M GUILTY. :) :) :)

Xoxo,Karen

On Eyeglasses

2008-07-09T17:22:00.000+08:00

I have to wear my eyeglasses. Almost all the time. Dammit. It's driving me crazyyy.

Xoxo,
Karen

How's My Heart Lately?

2008-07-09T16:21:00.000+08:00

That's probably an intriguing question my friends would want to know about. Good thing I already have an LJ because my friends don't know about this yet, so I can go on and on with this without thinking about what would people say.

Well, it's still beating, obviously, otherwise I'll be dead now... but not for him anymore. Yes, you've read it right. Not anymore. Finally.

I do believe that people change, and so do our feelings. I loved him with all my heart, no doubt about it, my family and friends can surely attest to that, but I guess time just takes it all away.

I must admit that it wasn't easy seeing him with his new girlfriend every effing day in school. Not to mention, the three of us in the same room for 2 months! It was crazy. Plus the fact that we had an examination to take. Just imagine how pressured I was and how much this love issue had been boggling my mind and troubling my heart, all happening simultaneously. What a way to be desensitized indeed. I've dealt everyday showing the least hint of angst, jealousy, remorse towards them. It was a difficult situation I had to face. But as time passed by, it became easier to manage. Just by the thought of him, giving me up for another girl, just made it a lot easier, actually. And of course, with my loving family and good friends around, the weight I had to carry was a lot lighter as I've imagined it to be, and I love and thank them for that.

People come and go, but the ones who truly love you will never leave you. Lesson learned.

Xoxo,Karen

2007-03-31T14:08:00.000+08:00

Of my three years of stay at the UST College of Nursing, I can say that third year was the most dreaded one. Almost all the subjects vital in my course were taken during this year. In first semester, I had my first encounter with Medical-Surgical, Pharmacology and Literature. In the beginning, MS was difficult to manage, for we had to read a number of chapters in Brunner for one topic for a 30-point-quiz or less. But then again, thanks to Udan for creating a book, where topics are summarized and understanding has become easier. Having Udan made me neglect reading Brunner a lot. I was thinking of managing my time wisely by reading the summarized book instead of the long chapters found in Brunner. I enjoyed Pharmacology, not only was I challenged in memorizing and understanding a lot of drugs, their mechanism of action, contraindications, side effects, and nursing considerations, but I really did adore our professor, Ma’am Lerma. Not only is she beautiful inside out, but she also posses a good heart. She has an enduring patience for her students, and she treats us as if we are her own children, and that really was a big factor in motivating me to learn and to strive harder. Literature was surely a subject to remember. Sir Hibek sure did make me a fighter or better yet, a survivor for that matter. We had so many things to do in a short period of time. We had to memorize a lot of poems, prepare for a wonderful presentation, which my RLE mates and I sure enjoyed a lot [no wonder, we had aperfect score!] and answer numerous out-of-this-world-questions in his exams. It was really a challenge. I thought surviving first semester was the end of it all, but came second semester. It made me weep, fearing I won’t be able to finish all of the requirements needed on time and to fail major subjects, including Literature and Biostatistics of course, which are both feeling major subjects talaga. Haha. We had MS and Literature again, Biostatistics, OB, Psychiatric Nursing and Sociology. Learning MS has become more pleasurable as time passed by. Ma’am Natividad sure gets our attention by cracking jokes about bokbok and poknat and her stories about her favorite mall, Mall of Asia, and a lot more, in between her lectures. I admire her teaching strategies. She doesn’t bring books or review materials in class, except for her powerpoint presentation of course, which shows how much she understands everything that she teaches us by heart. Literature on the other hand has become harder and harder to manage. We had short stories to understand and analyze profoundly, for in the exam, there were fill in the blanks, identification, and a lot more. There was also another presentation to prepare for, but unfortunately, our RLE didn’t do well in one of the short stories assigned to us, but I was proud of the narrators, which include yours truly, for getting Sir Hibek’s attention. He uttered a few compliments regarding our narration. It was one of a kind daw, and having been the one who suggested the chorale thing, I was really astounded of the success we have achieved. Then came the judgment day, the day we have to submit our thesis. Oh my. I have wasted so many tears for that thesis. As in. I was crying myself to sleep for I really didn’t know what to do with it, until I got inspired with the plus 5% if the thesis was to be submitted 4 days prior the real submission date. I enjoyed cramming and sleeping at 3am on a Friday, then waking up at 5am to prepare for my OR duty. I was in high spirits since I was able to finish it, but at the same time worn-out and drowsy. I felt guilty pa nga kasi I shouldn’t be sleepy on a duty, because we were dealing with people whose lives are at stake. One mistake and you’re out. Biostatistics was sisiw at first. I got a perfect score pa nga in our first quiz, but no, I should have savored that moment for it didn’t last long. It became complicated every meeting. Oh well. Sir Nuval is okay naman, but his lectures were just long enough to absorb everything in a short span of time. OB has always been my waterloo. Although our prof has always been active, or hyper so to speak, it's just not my forte talaga. Tsk. Psychiatric Nursing was out of the ordinary. Although I haven't been getting high grades in that subject, I still find it so interesting and challenging. I enjoyed reading my Psyche books to pieces. I get fascinated whenever I learn something new. Despite the fact that Dean's lecture has a drowsy effect, it surely made me diligent enough to read my books. Sociology added pa. We had to do three scrapbooks—Autobiography, about my family and about my future life, which includes the person I have become after a couple of years, the person I will marry, wedding plans, dream house, children, middle age and retirement plans, last will and testament, obituary and epitaph. It was fun doing those three scrapbooks, but my energy level dropped when Sr. Vinoya was not the one who checked our first two albums, but then again, my energy level regained when I was doing the third scrapbook.

Chris and I were planning on our future. We even argued on the names and number of our children. It was so funny talaga. I told him that I wanted two children—1 boy and 1 girl, and I want our baby girl’s name to be Nicole Andrea, and our baby boy’s name to be Lorenzo Gabriel. But then he made Andrea Nicole and Juan Miguel as the names for our children in his project. Haha. Talk about meeting half way. We even shared each other’s projects, and laughed about our crazy yet beautiful plans for our future. It was an experience to remember, since it was then have I realized how much we were so much thrilled in spending the rest of our lives together.

Regarding our hospital/ward rotation, I enjoyed the second semester rotations more. I enjoyed our shift in San Alberto Ward, Pedia Ward, Philippine Orthopedic Center and Operating Room. We had two shifts in Pedia, and I was overly ecstatic and fulfilled. Dealing with kids wasn’t my forte before, for I get easily annoyed with super kulit kids, but these two shifts transformed me into a better person—someone who appreciates up to the smallest thing the kids do and loves them for who and what they really are. It’s tough to evade not having favorite pedia clients. Lance and Jessica were my favorites. Both of them are just so sweet and adorable. They made little things which really made my heart melt. They were two of the reasons why I enjoyed having duty at Pedia ward. Despite the ratio of nurses to clients [2-3:1], just by seeing the kids smile, all the ka-toxican just fades away in an instant.

I also enjoyed our shift at POC. Not only did we get along with our clinical instructor [Sir JN Paat] that well, but also because we have gained knowledge of a lot of things and became conscious with our safety. Since most of the cases in the POC are accident-based, we have come to realize that being safe should be our priority. I also enjoyed our shift at the Operating Room. I felt like I was a part of Grey’s Anatomy or House MD. Haha. Feel na feel. Although my RLE mates and I had a little misunderstanding in the process of acquiring 10 cases, we were able to patch things up, and started all over again. Who I miss the most in our group is my bestfriend, Ria, because ever since we had a misunderstanding regarding OR, we haven’t been that close anymore. We’re no longer together most of the time. I’m becoming closer to somebody else, and she’s becoming closer to another person. [Selos?Haha.] I know it’s my fault to have let things happen just like that. I wish that I could have done something in order to save our treasured friendship, but then again, I wasn’t able to do anything. I was not courageous enough to accept the fact that I have done something wrong, and that she had good intentions that's why she said those things to me. It was hard for me to swallow my pride, and I failed to realize that she was indeed a true friend to consider, for she stabbed me in front. She was straightforward enough to convey her thoughts and feelings. And I, on the other hand, was so narrow-minded. I do hope that in time, we’ll be able to rebuild our almost wrecked friendship. I miss her so. [Mushy..]

Moving on, during my third year in college, I also received my first certificate—Basic Cardiac Life Support-Cardio Pulmonary Resuscitation Workshop. Although my RLE mates and I were super late for the workshop, we still managed to catch up and do very well in the return demo. I so enjoyed the CPR. Thousand snaps!!! It’s so amazing to realize that I have finally become someone who can actually save lives.

This school year was truly unforgettable. I must admit that despite the trying times, it has also been a wonderful time for me to experience a lot of things which definitely molded me into becoming what I am now—stronger and wiser. I am looking forward to another year filled with good memories.

2007-02-27T09:30:00.000+08:00

Happiness is a choice.

Since our prof in OB was absent, my classmates and I decided to go to the mall and catch a movie. Of all the six movies, we watched Number 23, since it was the only movie that started on the time of our arrival at the mall. Although it was not really among our choices, we still watched it, just so we can kill time and be with each other. Ultimate bonding experience. :) After that, we bought our super late lunch, and ate it in Pey's car because we didn't have much time anymore, since our other classmates told us that our prof in MS was already in the room. It was drizzling when we went back to school, which made us more ecstatic and at the same time, nervous, since we didn't want to be super late in class. Surprisingly, our prof didn't notice the six of us entered the room. Haha. :) Buti nalang. :) So there. What made my day ugly is the fact that some people just find meanings to your every action. It just pisses me off, you know. Although you don't have any bad intention or whatsoever, they assume that you are doing something mean/foul/below the belt/whatever you call it. And then they'll ask you if you're okay? Like, hello?! Do I seem okay? F*ck off. I know I just had my confession last Friday, but I just can't keep these things to myself. I just told Ria, JM and Pey that I will really control myself from saying comments and/or doing something which involve "them." Grr. Isn't it reasonable ba na I'll do the part where I've started my research? Why can't they understand that. I know it's not right to complain, but it's really just so disappointing.

And one more thing, I abhor copycats. Matamaan ka. Haha. :)

+ karen +

2007-02-11T10:11:00.000+08:00

Countdown: 4 days to go 'til Valentine's Day :)

Since the day of hearts is drawing near, I've changed my BG music to something mushy. Haha. :) I so love this song because it's just so romantic. Everytime I hear this song, I would always smile and imagine oh-so-wonderful things. Haha. I'd imagine myself in a cruise wit my MuyMuy. Perfectly romantic. Haay. I am so in love. :)

Prelims has finally ended. Yey! :) All the exams were just so difficult. Since the issue [Nursing Boards leakage] alarmed not just our country, but the whole world as well, our exams became harder to manage. Plus the fact that we aren't following the SD anymore [Criterion Reference na], surviving Nursing has become harder and harder. Of all the subjects we have this sem, it's Stat that I don't like the most. The lectures are becoming faster and faster and absorbing all of those information is becoming way too impossible. Especially for someone [like me] who easily gets sleepy listening to the lectures and having coffee is just not enough to stay awake. And so I thank him for being my mentor in Stat. :) Without him, I don't know what I'd do in that effing subject. Although I'm the type of person who asks too many questions and who gets easily angry/irritated everytime I can't follow him, he still remained patient and persevering. THANKS again! :)

I have to enjoy my weekend since we'll be loaded [again] next week. Reporting and Eval Exam wit Sir Paat, quizzes in MS [GU Disorders, et.al.], OB [Cardio, TORCH, et.al.] and Psych [Substance Abuse] to name a few. AND Orientation exam in OR!!! OMG. Loaded talaga. Haay. I hope it's true that we don't have classes on Monday so that I'll get ample time to sleep, relax and prepare for another week of ka-toxic-an. Haay. I'm becoming lazy lately. Haha. Not a good example. Haay. He is not feeling well today. Is it because of the tutoring thing? Haha. Sumakit ata ulo niya sa katuturo sakin. My grade in Stat better be worth it! I'm keeping my fingers crossed. Oh please lang talaga. :)

+ karen +

2007-01-21T15:00:00.000+08:00

I finally had time to update my blog. Yey! :) First and foremost, I'm so happy for my Ate Trina for passing the NCLEX about two weeks ago. Nax. I'm so proud of her! :) *Thanks for the "treats" sis! :)* Anyway, I'm currently enjoying our shift at Pedia Ward, Clinical Division, UST-H. Apart from the fact that my boi's sched overlaps wit my sched during th-f-s, the kids are just so adorable, especially Jessica, who is apparently my fave, and my boi's. :) I must say that I never really enjoyed dealing wit kids that much, but this shift made me appreciate kids much better. :) Although the ratio of clients to nurses is 3-4:1, just by seeing the kids smile, all the ka-toxic-an will fade away. :) We only have a week to go at Pedia Ward, and two weeks from now, we'll be dealing wit a lot of bones! Literally. Haha. We'll be having our duty at POC [Philippine Orthopedic Center] just in time for our Prelims. Whoah. Great. After our duty at POC, we'll be having our late exams. Huwhaaat. I can't imagine that. Stressed from duty, tapos may exams pa on the same day? Argh. We can't have our shift at POC rescheduled. How terrible. Paano nalang kami makakareview nyan? Dammmit. That would be all. Tata. :)

+ karen +

2006-12-27T17:10:00.000+08:00

I'd just have to say that Wentworth Miller is uber hot. I'm in love wit him na! Hah! ;-) [But I'm still in love with Chad Michael Murray, Sam Milby and Gerald Anderson too. Hah. Pathetic? ;-)]

For two days straight, I was able to finish season one and ten episodes of season two of Prison Break. Addict? Hah. ;-) [I finally had time to watch DVDs again. Hah. Thanks for the 2-week-break. Snaps!] Grabe. Super bitin. Dammit. I have to watch the rest of the episodes of season two. Waa. Super nice ng story grabe! And He's so GORGEOUS pa. Hahaha!

L-R: Alexis, Jing, Kar, Ria and Cla

L-R: Jing, Kar and Ria

Anyway, I saw these pictures at Ria's Multiply, and I also have to say that I miss my barkada [since first year college] already. I miss how we spend our free time together. We were complete then, but now? Jing has a new set of friends already. So sad. Kson has his own world na din. Haha. Actually, matagal na siyang F.O. Haha. ;-) But I'm still happy because I know Kams, Fred, and the rest of their group, have been taking care of our dear friend, Jing. And Kson? Haha. EWAN. [Kidding!] ;-) I know the two of them are happy wit their new group of friends, and so I'm happy for them too. ;-) I just miss the good ol' times.

I miss my RLE too. I'm looking forward to our RLE day come January. Love love. ;-)

More pics at MY MULTIPLY. Check it out. ;-) That would be all for now. ;-) HAPPY HOLIDAYS!!!

+ karen +

2006-12-24T15:55:00.000+08:00

Okay. So he actually deleted me on his list of friends [friendster]. I can't believe it. :( I know I've been such a devil to him for quite some time, but I still can't get his point of doing such. Argh. All those testimonials from the very start of our so-called friendship to being lovers have all been gone. With just one click, it's all gone. I hate it. Although we have talked about it already, still, I can't get it out of my system. It's just so frustrating. It's just so sad to think about. Tsk. Oh well. It's just "friendster" as he would say. Haay. I'm overreacting once again. Maybe he was just that mad at me at that time kaya niya nagawa yun. Haay. Nakakapanghinayang talaga. Enough about that.

Anyway, tomorrow's gonna be the 9th morning. Yey! I feel so fulfilled whenever I get the chance to complete it. ;-) I'm just a little sad that we won't be going to the province for Xmas and New Year. I'm missing my relatives already... especially my dear cousins, Neil John and Ikoy, who I don't get to see as often as I like [since, of course, they live so far away], and also my Lola. And so, I'll just spend my vacation pigging out, watching so many DVDs, which, by the way, I haven't started doing since the Xmas break started, sleeping for long hours, keeping in touch with my friends, and of course, with my boy, and taking care of Fishy [Allen's fish], which he handed me before he left for the province. Gosh. I don't like pets pa naman. Hah. But for Allen's sake, I'll take care of Fishy. Fishy is lethargic and apathetic. Omg. I don't know what to do anymore. I've been talking to him [yeah, I know I'm pathetic. haha.] and yet he seem to care less. Crucial. Can't wait for Allen to come back here in Manila. Haha. Maybe Fishy misses Allen lang? Hah. Ewan. ;-)

I've changed my layout as you guys can see. Yey! I finally had time to update my blog. Snaps. ;-)

I miss my boy so much.

+ karen +

2006-12-23T10:50:00.000+08:00

I don't understand why there's always someone who's gonna be hurt in one way or another.

It's been a while since I last checked my blog. I've been busy with school, as always. We had our monthly exam from 18 December to 20 December. Imagine, 5 days before Xmas, we still had to go to school for the exams and for the much-awaited Paskuhan. Our school really did make the most out of the month. Our prof said that classes will resume on the 3rd of January. Whaaat? Why so early? Dammit.

Anyway, on the last day of the Monthly exam, my RLE mates and I went to SM San Lazaro to have lunch at Chef d' Angelo. Guia, Nicole and Pey brought their cars that's why we were able to arrive at the mall that fast. While Guia was buying a gift for Maricar, we saw some of our friends from 3-8. Grabe. I miss them.. bigtime! After that, we headed to Chef to meet our other RLE mates. Before eating, we exchanged gifts. I'd like to thank Pey for his gift. Although it wasn't what I wrote on our Wish List, it still meant something to me. Thanks again! ;-) I'd also like to thank John Mike and Chino for being with us on that special event, since they are the ones who always have other business to attend to every time we schedule for an RLE bonding. Your presence really did mean something to us. *Puke* Haha! No, seriously, it was almost perfect when the two of you were there. Thanks! After lunch, we headed straight to G-Box to exercise our vocal cords, to show our hidden talent in singing, and to just enjoy each other's company. It was more than what I've expected. I never really imagined that all of us would be that happy. Like what Ria said, it was a euphoric experience for our RLE. ;-) The place wasn't bad for P100 per hour. The price was cheap, but the place wasn't. Get it? Got it? Good. Hah. As always, my first song was Breathless by the Corrs. I just love singing that song. I remember the time when Clarice celebrated her 18th birthday in Bulacan, I sang that song to Chris. Hah. Very memorable. ;-) Anyway, we had so many pictures during our lunch date and our videoke session. I hope that our RLE would have another bonding experience like this. We even planned on alloting a day, our so-called RLE day, come January. G-Box would definitely earn a lot! Hah. ;-) Before heading home, Nicole tried to drive Pey's car. She was really funny! Hah. Thanks to Pey for driving me home. Though I've given him wrong directions, eh he didn't get mad at me naman. Haha. Thanks! Gawd. I'm loving Lifehouse bigtime! Their songs are just so great! Lalang. Just wanna share. Haha. ;-) Oh, before I forget, another highlight for this day is that Kate and I reconciled already! Yey! ;-) After 2 weeks of not talking to each other, we've finally patched things up. Thanks to my RLE, especially to the boys, for really exerting so much effort to reconcile us. Super thanks! ;-) I've realized that things won't be so complicated if only there's an open communication. What happened to Kate and I was just a little misunderstanding which led to something deeper. I regret not talking about the problem with her before things got worse, but then again, everything happens for a reason right? In fact, I consider what happened as a blessing in disguise. Why? Because I became close with my RLE mates, especially to Yna and Maricar. Yna and I were not that close before, and when this happened, I realized that there's more to her than what meets the eye. She taught me a lot of things, like having an open mind and a forgiving heart. Thanks to Yna! She's my angel. ;-) Maricar has also been an angel to me. I remember the time when we were camwhoring at the catwalk, and then I saw Chris, then something bad happened between Chris and I, and she and suki [Kat] saw me and really gave me comfort thru their warm hugs and Kat's hanky. I really appreciate their effort. I'll never forget that. Love you both! ;-)

Moving on, before going to the Paskuhan, Chai and I went to the Salon infront of the school to have my eyebrows done. I must admit napabayaan ko na eyebrows ko because of too much stress in school. Hah. So I did what I had to do. Then we headed to the Main Building where the fireworks display was seen best. Well, compared to the view outside the school. Haha. ;-) I was so glad that I've finally seen the fireworks display with just 1 minute late. Last year kasi, Ria, Chris and I were late for about 3 minutes. Haha. The fireworks display was just so beautiful. Although it wasn't as beautiful as last year's, eh pwede na din naman. Maganda parin. ;-) There were a lot of people who came. The saying, "di mahulugang karayom" is very applicable for this matter. Nalula ako. As in. Tinopak pa yung Globe, kaya mas lalo akong nabwiset. Tsk. Sending messages was just so difficult. Plus the fact that I can't even call. Argh. I got teary-eyed na nga because I wasn't able to have a clear conversation with "him." Ria and I planned pa nga that we would go home na after dinner, since both of us were pissed off already. She lost her digi cam case and her hunny wasn't there to enjoy the moment with her, and I couldn't find "him." Dammit. Good thing Nicole came to the rescue. She made the impossible possible. I finally saw him, and lucky me, I was able to spend some time with him. Although there were bad things that happened, yung good things parin yung nanginbabaw. I made a mistake, again, but I was able to do something about it. Whooh. Thank God. I just couldn't afford to make a mistake again, and lose him for the nth time. I can't handle that anymore. I lost him so many times already, and I couldn't bear losing him again. It was a night to remember. Although I went home a bit early, okay lang din. Worth it, baby. ;-)

Just when I thought that everything's already fine, here comes another misunderstanding. I just can't understand why he didn't mention that he's gonna go to EK right after their Xmas party yestderday. I've waited for his reply, and I received nothing. So I just slept. When I woke up, I've received a couple of text messages from him. Ni hindi ko pa malalaman na nag EK sila kung di ko pa tinanong. Ano ba naman yan. Tsk. He was with his classmates naman diba, and it's way too impossible that none of them brought a cellphone. His excuse of losing batt wasn't valid. Well, atleast for me. Haay. Andaming paraan. Nakakafrustrate.

I just hope that people will learn how to be sensitive when they have to. I am doing my part. I am doing what I ought to do. And I need him to do what he has to do. Dammit. It's always like this. If it's not him who's hurt, it's me. And if it's not me who's hurt, it's him. Argh. Why just can't both of us be happy at the SAME time with EACH OTHER. Was i overreacting? Or was it really his fault? Dammit.

Life is not fair. Who said it is anyway? It never was and never will be. *Sob*

+ karen +

2006-11-19T09:55:00.000+08:00

Hope it'll last. :)

Love is still the greatest thing in the world. Isn't it? :)

+ karen +

2006-10-31T06:20:00.000+08:00

Before anything else, I'd like to great my cousin, Ikoy, [Hi Parts!!] a HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY!! ;-)

MEN ARE LIKE.. blah blah blah.

1. Men are like.......Laxatives.......They irritate the crap out of you.

2. Men are like.......Bananas.......The older they get, the less firm they are.

3. Men are like.......Weather.......Nothing can be done to change them. [Haha! This is so TRUE!!]

4. Men are like.......Blenders.......You need one, but you're not quite sure why. [Haha! Mega and I can relate to this one.]

5. Men are like.......Chocolate Bars.......Sweet, smooth, & they usually head right for your hips.

6. Men are like.......Commercials........You can't believe a word they say.

7. Men are like.......Department Stores.......Their clothes are always 1/2 off.

8. Men are like.......Government Bonds.......They take soooooooo long to mature. [Haha! True enough!]

9. Men are like.......Mascara.......They usually run at the first sign of emotion. [Aww. Can't deny the fact that they really do.]
10. Men are like.......Popcorn.......They satisfy you, but only for a little while. [Haha! True.. again.]

11. Men are like.......Snowstorms.......You never know when they're coming, how many inches you'll get or how long it will last. [Gawd, Mega, where did you get this ba? Haha! True ulit!!]

12. Men are like.......Lava Lamps.......Fun to look at, but not very bright. [Haha! No comment.]

13. Men are like.......Parking Spots.......All the good ones are taken, the rest are handicapped. [Whahahahaha! Yun lang. Hahaha!]

No offense, guys, just got this from Mega. ;-) Gawd, I miss Mega BIGTIME. I love you, jerk! ;-)

Anyway, I was with my first year college classmates in Baguio for three days two nights. Gawd. It was a blast! I had sooo much fun! For once, I wasn't really able to think about him that much. Sure, I thought about him once in awhile, but not too much naman, like what I'd usually do here in Manila. We stayed at Camp John Hay Manor. [I missed the place. Really. When I was still a kid, my family would usually go there every break.] The place was just so relaxing. Nakakatanggal talaga ng stress. I felt like I was far from all the troubles and heartaches. Hah. Drama. Since it was so cold in Baguio, my friends and I decided to drink for two nights. Haha. Grabe. It was the first time talaga na tinamaan talaga ako. Super. We drank too much ata the first night. Haha! We all turned red and we were all bangag. After the drinking session, bagsak lahat kami sa bed. Haha. Super memorable. I'm missing it already. [Next time ulit, guys!] On the second night, I didn't drink much na, because we had to wake up early the following day. Si Jof lang yung super lakas uminom nung last night namin. He must've remembered someone. Haay. Comfort. Pero I think he's better when he's drunk, kasi he doesn't tease me eh. Haha! Silang dalawa ni Cid, grabe kung mang-asar eh. Super olats ako. Hah. It was also on our second night when I've asked so many questions to Aya and Cid. Haha. Hotseat talaga. [Chismosa talaga ako. Haha. Thanks to Kesh and Kams sa paghelp sakin mag extract ng infos. Haha! I'm missing the two of you na..] And tama bang pati ako tanungin nila ng kung anu-ano? Haha. Unlike Cid, derechong tanong, derechong sagot naman yung sakin. Haha! What else? Hmm. I can't deny the fact that it's great to spend some time with your special someone in Baguio. Apart from the fact that it's so cold there, [Hah. It's a wonderful feeling diba to hug someone when the weather/climate's just so great? ;-) I can smell opportunity. Haha.] there are so many wonderful sights too [Picture galore sana. Argh]. I envied Aya and Cid nga kasi ultimate bonding sila. Super daming mushy moments, and I just couldn't control myself from staring at them and wishing that he's with us. Haha. Pathetic. Yan tuloy, I remembered him ulit. Dammmit. So there, I've uploaded our pictures in Baguio. You guys can check out my multiply. ;-)

I just wanna share with you what Jof sent me about three days ago. Here it goes..

"It's better to have NOBODY than somebody who is half yours, half there or doesn't want to be there, or is there and then suddenly disappears."

Omg. Tinamaan naman ako diba. Haha. Wake up call na ba to? Hah. Haay. I just hate the fact that I loved too much, only to find out that he's not for me talaga. We just can't work things out. There's always something tearing us apart. Although I've been trying to patch things up with him, wala parin talaga. Oh well. Is this the part where I can surely say that enough is really enough? Crap.

Eto pa, from Kat. Hah. Patama ba lahat? Pwe.

"You deserve someone better.."

One of the most bullshit reasons I've ever heard. Why? Because he could have been better if he tried to, and it could have been me, if he wanted to.

Oh well. Walang ka effort effort eh. What can I say? Or kung meron nga, hindi ko makita.. hindi ko maramdaman. Madrama na kung madrama, pero wala talaga eh. Ain't a manghuhula. I don't know what he wants. Crap talaga. Tapos he'll say na he wants me to still communicate with him? What the? What for?? Haay. Okay lang naman sana eh, kung hindi ako yung always nagpaparamdam ng una. Pansin ko lang noh. Siya naman ulit. I miss the old times. I feel like I don't know him anymore. :-( He's just too hard to understand. Well, for someone who never explains, talagang mahirap maintindihan. Tapos he went pa dun sa trip nila ng HS friends niya. Waa. Great. I told myself that if he goes there, this is the end of it all. Maybe this is really enough. Argh. He didn't listen to me, and I hate him for that. :-(

"Love has no room for selfish people who think only of themselves. If we have been too busy with our work, have been kept by our distorted priorities then it's about time that we stop for a while and think about the people who we might have stepped on and taken for granted, love isn't forever. Let us not wait too long to appreciate those who have unselfishly given it to us for all that may be left tomorrow are just the bitter and cold memories of someone who loved too much but was never loved enough."

I just can't be like this forever. I mean, dwelling on this situation of ours. Crying over him. Wishing for the impossible. And the list goes on. I have to go on with my life. I've done my part, I'll give him the time and space that he needs, and If he really loves me a lot naman diba, he'll take all the risks to have me once again. It's all up to him.

So Sick by Ne Yo.. Just loving it. Dammmit.

'Til then.

+ karen +

2006-10-22T18:20:00.000+08:00

Okay, so it's currently 12:40am on my watch. Everybody's sleeping. Well, what I meant was, everybody related to this entry are currently in the state of REM I suppose.

For the past few days, there are certain things that really bother me a lot, and I really mean a lot. There's this friend of mine, who apparently knows a little something about me and my ex-boyfriend, who asked me one question: "Well.. given the chance to do it all again, would you have chosen not to have him in your life? Para wala nalang pain." Without any hesitations, I said no. It was supposed to end there. One question, one answer, done. Yet, after answering his question, I've asked myself, "Why?" I've done some thinking/reflecting/whatever you call it for a moment, and I've realized that perhaps I just loved him that much. The love I've had and I have for him is just so hard to define. It's too deep, too crazy. That even after all the hurt he's brought into my life and after all his broken promises of forever and more, I'd fall in love with him all over again. I still want that special chapter, where we were both happy and inlove, written in my life, although I know the way the story ends. Because even if our story has not been a fairytale-ish one, my love for him is a lot greater than the pain I'm feeling now. I'd risk everything for that moment of bliss to happen once more. But then again, knock-knock to reality, what I'm feeling is nothing if he's not doing his part. I can't do this alone. I mean, fixing this whole mess up. I need him to do his part. Please baby, do your part naman. :( He's got so many reasons, which, if you would guys know, are just so lame. And I just can't figure out why two people who are still inlove with each other can't be together anymore. I don't know what's on his mind, what his plans are, and what's his real say to this set-up of ours. I think we're close to the point of breaking apart, and I so hate to admit it. I can't believe this is happening. It's all just so fast, and I could barely breathe and catch up. Though he tells me that he loves me still, I'd just probably stick to what people say, "Kung gusto, maraming paraan. Kung ayaw, maraming dahilan." Get what I mean? Crap. It's as if it's only me who wants to have "us" again. It's only me who has so many ways of fixing this mess, who exerts so much effort just for us to be back in each other's arms again, and the list goes on. Bottom line is, it's only me who obviously has so many ways to solve this problem, and him, who has these so many LAME reasons.

A friend once told me that if I really want our relationship to work, one has to sacrifice, and so I followed him. My ex-boyfriend told me that he doesn't want me to go to our Beach Trip, and of course, as a sacrifice, though I really love the beach and everything related to it, I'll not go, and that I'd rather go to Baguio with our friends and hopefully be with him too so that we could get sometime to talk things over and get this over with. So I told him about it, and what my plans are, and I was really hoping to get a positive feedback from him, like appreciation perhaps, but no, he said things which really did hurt, and a lot more. He also said that he can't go to Baguio for some reasons, only to find out that he has plans on having a 3-day-2-night-beach trip with his HS friends, which apparently includes this girl, who I would usually see with him on various pictures in his friendster, which, thank God, he already deleted. I can't deny the fact that I'm really upset. I don't know why I get so jealous whenever he mentions his HS friends to me. Maybe because I just don't know them personally, and they haven't gained my trust yet. Oh well. I told my ex-boyfriend that I'd be happy if he won't go. Yes, I do sound selfish, but I just can't lie to him by saying that I'm so okay with it. I'd rather appear selfish but honest, than lie and pretend everything's okay with me. I just don't want him to go. That's all. It's not that I'm demanding him to follow me or anything, but I'm just hoping that things will turn out perfectly fine by letting himself analyze the situation more deeply and be able to realize what my point is. I just want to know if I matter to him, if what I say matters to him. Just that. Is it too much to ask? If he's still going, then I guess this is the end of it all. Sad to say, but I really must face reality that he just don't care about my feelings anymore. :(

For the record, I am really thankful for all those who are doing something for me and my ex-boyfriend to get back together, but I better get this one straight, I JUST WISH THAT YOU GUYS ARE REALLY TRYING TO HELP US, AND ARE NOT DOING SOMETHING TO TEAR US APART. In times like these, I really don't know who my real friends and enemies are. Thanks to this young man, which made me realize that everything is a blur. Just when I thought that this young man [my ex-boyfriend's close friend, and my friend as well] was on my side, well, on the side where karen and chris is still possible for that matter, here he comes, doing something which I personally believe made this problem worse. Well, both of them are still denying it. Don't fool me. I can see the obvious. You've done the same thing with me, can't you remember? Hah. Get a life.

Haay. There's still more. There's this person I've known for almost 4 years already, and I can't deny the fact that I was hurt when that person left me without a trace. No explanations, no communication, no.. everything. Who woundn't? To cut the story short, that person showed up to me once again, said sorry, which I honestly wanted to hear from that person for like 3-4 years ago. I know it's been years already, but having heard that that person's sorry for everything that person has done to me was really something I did appreciate a lot. It sounded so sincere. But I have to caution myself from being close to that person again, for I can no longer have my broken heart be broken so much more. Hah. Just by seeing that person holding his cellphone all the time and texting makes me even more cautious, and not to mention, even more paranoid. I can't handle that.. I abhore infidelity. Hah. As if.

Why can't just everyone be happy? There's always something that interferes. Crap. And if people left you once, why is it that when they come back, and when you're already attached to them again, it's almost the same time that they're about to leave you again. It's a cycle I have to deal with. So sad but true. "PEOPLE ALWAYS LEAVE."

I know my heart will soon get tired of all these drama. I just don't know when. Only God knows.

+ karen +

2006-10-15T20:20:00.000+08:00

Okay, I must acknowledge Fonz for having said something which really made me think deeply. He said that people who are malabo exist so that we can appreaciate the not malabo ones. It was something like that. Infainess, he has a point, right? Hehe! I know it was quite simple, but hearing it from Fonz was really something different. Hehe! Nahawa na ata siya sa pagkasenti ko. Haha! Well anyway, since my fave number is 57, I've made a list which my boy, atleast he used to be, ought to know.

57 things he has to know:

1. you're the man i want see the sunrise and sunset with.
2. you're the man i want to be with in the wee hours.
3. you're the man i want to walk down the beach at midnight.
4. you're the man i want to dance and sing along with.
5. you're the man i want to stand cold under the rain with.
6. you're the man i want to hug and kiss as often as possible.
7. you're the man i want to spend every second possible with.
8. you're the man i want to hold hands with.

9. you're the man i want to tickle after a big fight.
10. you're the man i want to whisper "i love you baby" and "i'm sorry baby" softly in the ears.
11. you're the man i want to see asleep on my lap or on my shoulder.
12. you're the man i want to kiss goodnight.
13. you're the man i want to see in dreamland.
14. you're the man i want to share my dreams and sorrows with.
15. you're the man i want to laugh and cry with.
16. you're the man i want to see in school each and everyday.
17. you're the man i want to be with every break.
18. you're the man i love to review my lessons with.
19. you're the man i love to text with.
20. you're the man i love to stare at.
21. you're the man i want the world to see i'm with.
22. you're the man i want to take pictures with.
23. you're the man i want to send notes or letters of mush.
24. you're the man i want to take care of me when i'm sick or atleast when i feel weak.
25. you're the man i want the voice to hear all the time.
26. you're the man i want to wipe away the tears falling down from my face.
27. you're the man i enjoy sharing corny jokes with.
28. you're the man i want to be with in watching concerts and in Paskuhan.
29. you're the man i want to walk along the corridors with.
30. you're the man i want to stroll around the school with.
31. you're the man i want to be with in watching the kids get wet in the fountain.
32. you're the man i want to be with in watching the fireworks display in school every Decemeber.
33. you're the man i want to be with everytime i blow my candles.

34. you're the man i want to be with after a long and tiring day.
35. you're the man i want to hug me after a perspiring activity.
36. you're the man i so love to tease.
37. you're the man i want to see romantic movies with.
38. you're the man i want to eat ice cream with.
39. you're the man i want to runaway from the unfriendly world with.
40. you're the man i want to be with in search for a safer place to be in.
41. you're the man i want to wait for as long as forever.
42. you're the man i love to fight for.
43. you're the man i think about every second of any given day.
44. you're the man i want to see first when i wake up and last one to see before i sleep.
45. you're the man i miss so much even after we've been together.
46. you're the man i enjoy being with even if there are no words to utter.
47. you're the man i love to support and praise.
48. you're the man i never get sick and tired of.
49. you're the man i trust my fragile heart.
50. you're the man i ever want and need.
51. you're the man i want to be thankful for.
52. you're the man i consider as one of the most beautiful blessings i've received.
53. you're the man i consider as one of the most beautiful creatures on earth.
54. you're the man i want to walk down the aisle with.
55. you're the man i want to tell the world, "the only one for me."
56. you're the man i want to spend everyday for the rest of forever with.
57. and most importantly, you're the man i love and will love again and again and again.

Would you lie with me and just forget about the world?

+ karen +

2006-10-15T09:30:00.000+08:00

At long last, 1st sem's officially over! Hurrah! ;-) As always, our Lit exam was difficult! As a matter of fact, it was the MOST difficult exam I took. Imagine, Lit was able to beat MS, which is apparently 5 units. OMG. How am i supposed to know the various works of the various authors? When in fact, we didn't even mention those authors and their works in class. It was extremely a guessing-game type of test. Argh. I don't want to fail Lit. God, help me. Pharma was also hard, since there were a lot of drugs which we had to memorize, and not only the name and classification of drugs, but the mode of action, side effects and nursing responsibilities as well. Socio was kind of hard too since it was an essay type of test, wherein we had to put in not more than 50 bullets stating everything we have learned in Laborem. I was like staring at the questionaire for 10-15 minutes, carefully reading the instruction, which was so hard to understand. It was so labo, I'm telling you. Hehe ;-) What else? Hmm. MS was hard too, as always! It was worth 100 points. MS skills lab was kind of hard, since I wasn't able to read the entire chapter on catheterization. Golly. Pedia was also hard. Haha. Lahat na lang hard! Well, the questions in Pedia were kind of tricky. Oh well, enough about the finals, it's just so frustrating to think about. Haay.

Yesterday, as we all know, is Friday the 13th and the last day of the sem. Was it because of the date which made yesterday a terrible one? Or was it because everytime finals will come to an end, Chris and I would always fight? Argh. I so hate it. I've waited for him for like 2 hours, and when he arrived, we just fought. When we were already okay, he said something which made me teary-eyed. I just couldn't afford letting him see me about to cry, so I left him without even saying goodbye. I so hate it that he spoiled my day. Yes, I must admit, I had done something which aggravated the whole thing, but then it's not enough to spoil a girl's day. I've waited for long hours just to see and be with him, and that was all I got? It's just so disappointing. We've wasted so many hours arguing, which could've been spent to heaven-ish moments instead. And now, I'm still waiting for a text from him, saying how he's doing, where he is, what he's doing, and the list goes on. I'm always waiting for him. I don't know how long I'll be able to get through this, but I intend to wait as long as possible. As long as I still find reasons to fight for him and for as long as he tells me that he loves me. Haay. Look what love does.

Anyway, after two long weeks, I've finally celebrated my 20th birthday wit my kada.

It's just so sad because not all of my closest friends made it. Some had to attend their PM duty, while some were in Nueva Ecija for their Community Organizing. Good thing Ria, Ludz and Cla made it. Atleast I was still able to celebrate my special day wit them. ;-)

+ karen +

2006-10-05T14:10:00.000+08:00

Thanks to all the people who remembered my birthday! Via text, phone call, along the corridors, at the gym, friendster, multiply, blog, etc. ;-) I'm sorry I can't name you guys one by one since my celphone got stolen at the Araneta last Monday, 02 Oct. 06. Some effing guy/girl opened my bag and stole my phone! Whoever got my phone is a freaking a**hole. Hay nako. He/she spoiled my day! Good thing UST won at game 3. Wee! Cheers to UST! *I heart JAPS CUAN and CHESTER TAYLOR! They are SUPER hunks! Haha! ;-)* And another good thing, I was wit a "friend." He definitely gave me moral support.. All the way! Thanks to you. Thanks to your shoulder and tight hugs. You made my day! ;-) So to all those who sent me text messages on 02 Oct. 06, 3:30 onwards, sorry kung hindi ko kayo nareplyan [you already know my reason]. Just got my number back yesterday, so text me nalang ulit, and please include your name na din. Thanks so much! ;-)

Lesson learned: DON'T EVER BRING YOUR VALUABLES IN CROWDED PLACES OR BE EXTRA CAREFUL WITH YOUR BELONGINGS. Tsk. GOD BLESS HIM/HER. Haay.

I have so many kwentos, yet I still have two quizzes tomorrow [and I just got home from the victory party! haha! talk about having priorities! ;-)] and I still don't have a decent biblio which is due tomorrow. Tsk. I am so SLEEPY already. Haay. So next time nalang! Maybe after the finals next week or sa weekened. Let's just see. Hehe! ;-) I miss HIM na! Tsk. Away2x nanaman. If you're reading this, wala lang. Haha! Thanks for deleting the crappy pics on your friendster.. Just saw your friendster now. ;-)

That would be all for now! Cheerio! ;-)

+ karen +

2006-09-24T18:57:00.000+08:00

I'm back to blogging. ;-)

I've been sick since Sunday night. I had fever accompanied by cough and colds. My temperature reached 39.5 degrees Celsius, and my cough was non-productive. Last Monday, I didn't finish Skills Lab since I wasn't really feeling well. I just took the quiz and stayed for a couple of minutes for the lecture [since there was a new topic: bowel treatment] and then I went to the Health Service for check-up, then went home to get some rest, so that I'd have enough energy for the duty later that afternoon. I was not satisfied.. AT ALL.. with the check-up. I mean, anong klaseng check-up ba ang hindi pag aauscultate? Thinking I had a cough. Hello?! The doctor should check diba the lung sounds and everything. But no, she just asked me a few questions and advised me to continue taking Paracetamol for fever and advised me to take Sinecod forte, which is an antitussive by the way, for cough. Thinking that she's a doctor, I followed her. I continued Paracetamol every four hours and I bought Sinecod forte. Later that evening, my mum and I rushed to the UST-H Laboratory to have a CBC done. The following day, my temperature went up, so I wasn't able to attend my duty, it was 5 hours by the way, so I have to schedule for a make up class for 5 hours. Tsk. Hassle. I again went to the Health Service for check-up and to ask for a medical certificate to excuse me for being absent on that same day. I was so pissed off with the attending nurse and the physician! The nurse was so impolite and the physician was so impolite too, and not to mention, he was too awful! His personality doesn't really match in being a physician. He wasn't a people person. I just don't like him! And again, he didn't auscultate my lungs! Hello?! Not again! Strike two na ang Health Service. Tsk. Tapos hindi pa niya alam yung tinake kong gamot ah. Wtf* Wala ba siyang MIMS? Grr. Again, I went to the Lab, to have another CBC done, just to check if my platelet count was going down or what. Then last Wednesday, I've decided to go to school, since I don't want to have a total of 10 hours for duty make-up. But before going to the ward, a 3rd CBC was done. Sad to say, my platelet count was going done and my WBCs were going down too. So I became terrified, and yet I still forced myself to go to the ward, and really practiced to look and act as naturally as possible. However, my clinical instructor advised me to go home because I looked pale. :-( Honestly speaking, I couldn't control my tears from flowing down my face after she said that. I thought about the 10-hour-make-up and my total health condition too. I pity myself from having been sick. Really. Nakakaawa talaga sarili ko. Was very weak, febrile, and pale. As in namumutla talaga lips ko. Oh, before I forget, before going to the ward nga pala that day, I vomited. Tsk. That made me even more paranoid. I've asked myself, "Nako, ano ba talaga 'tong sakit ko? May suka effect pako." :-( Haay. Good thing my mum's always there for me to take care of me and give everything I want and need while I was sick. She pampered me with a lot of Gatorade [thanks mum! I love Gatorade! ;-)] and with a lot of fruits! ;-) I must say that in those times that I've been sick, I missed Chris. I don't know why. But thoughts of him would pop in my head and haunt me in every waking day, and it just made me so sad and diasppointed. Sad because he's not around and disppointed because he didn't even notice last Monday, when we almost bumped into each other, that I was sick. I mean, wasn't it obvious? Or was it just because he just didn't care? Tsk. Here I am again, formulating a lot of theories. Haay. There are just so many questions on my head, searching for answers. Tsk. Anyway, what else happened? So last Thursday, I really couldn't afford missing the quiz in Pedia, so eventhough I haven't studied enough for the quiz, I still went to school to take the quiz. It was hard, ofcourse, especially to someone who hasn't studied enough, and I really mean enough, and it was so long. Or did it just appear long because I just couldn't guess for the right answers that fast? Haha. Haay. So disappointing. Tsk. I attended the class of Sr. too since my classmates said that we were going to watch a film. Eh knowing Sister, magbibigay talaga yun ng essay assignment, so hindi talaga ako pwedeng mag cut ng class. [Thanks to Jason, by the way, for lending me his I.D. ;-) Bawal kasi sa class ni Sr. na walang I.D. eh.] So sa Lit and afternoon classess nalang ako nag cut.. Although it was really against my will, I really had to, because I was chilling in our room and I was coughing and coughing. :-( After lunch, I slept and when I woke up at around 4pm, I received a text message form Nicole saying that Chris had his hair cut. OMG. Semi-kal nanaman daw. I was like, "Oh no. I can't see him like that. Tempting." Haha. I really really like Chris when he's kalbo. He looks good when he's kalbo. Grr. Haha. ;-) So the next day, we had a quiz in Pharma, but before that, Janelle, Guia, Nicole, Cza and I were outside the classroom, and we saw Chris and Nicole's boyfriend. We were laughing and laughing because I was really PATHETIC!! Haha! If you only guys know what I did. Haha! I bet, you'll laugh too! ;-) Thanks to Janelle, by the way, for asking her friends to go to the IPEA office to buy UAAP tickets for Nicole and I. Buti pa si Nicole, kasama si Chris. Haha! Tsk. Anyway, it's almost 4am na. Gosh. I still don't feel sleepy, but I really have to sleep na because I have to wake up early tomorrow, I mean later, to hear mass, since the basketball game [UST vs. ADMU] would start at 4pm. OMG. I am so thrilled! I hope UST wins. Go TIGERS!! ;-)

I'd also like to take this opportunity to thank my bestfriend #1, Kamille and her friend, Kim, for getting extra tickets for me, Ria and Guia awhile ago. Super thanks! ;-) CONGRATULATIONS to my very dear friend, Topher, for making it in the prepageant. I am so happy for you!! I am a proud manager!! Haha! ;-) And thanks to all the people who asked how I was doing, what my conditon was, and to all those who basically remembered me while I was sick. I really appreciate every concern you guys showed me -- verbally and non-verbally. THANK YOU! ;-)

That would be all for now! Tata! ;-)

+ karen +

mi amor: si te tuviera mi vida seria perfecta.

2006-09-18T05:25:00.000+08:00

C.E.G.M: THIS ONE'S FOR YOU. HOPE YOU'LL READ THIS.

I AM SO DISAPPOINTED IN YOU! :-( How could you? I've trust you long enough. You don't have my effing TRUST anymore. You've been successful, once again, you've made me cry. You're making this "moving on" of mine really easy. Thanks a lot!

Redeem yourself while you still can.

+ karen +

2006-09-13T14:59:00.000+08:00

100 plus snaps to the Salinggawi Dance Troupe for winning [again!] the cheerdance competition last Sunday, 10th of September 2006! 5 times in a row.. WOW! ;-)

My groupmates and I were working on our sh*tty CHN project while watching TV. We were all eyes when it was UST's turn. I was really concentrating and really praying hard at the same time that our school will once again win. Thank God, we did! ;-) And that made me even more proud to be a Thomasian! For a moment, we were in a state of bliss, until everything ended, and went back to reality -- we weren't finished yet with our CHN project. Crap. Too much stress, pare. Since the prelims ended, I haven't had enough rest, partly because of our unfinished CHN project, Lit presentation, and of course, this late-nite internet addiciton of mine. Sh*t. Good thing I can see progress recently. We're almost done in CHN. Yey! By Friday, I hope we'll be able to submit the entire thing to Ma'am Severo. Please lang talaga. Nakakastress na talaga to. Anyway, after long hours of practice in Lit and having just two hours of sleep just before our Lit presentation, we finally made it! We got a perfect score! Applause*Applause! ;-) Not only that, the remaining groups got a perfect score too! Our prof said that our section was the section to beat. But fortunately, we remained undeafeated. Haha! ;-) I totally had fun! Much to my surprise, it was only our group which was super laugh trip! From the names of the characters, down to the choreography.. Wala akong masabi. Haha! ;-) Great job, rle two! ;-) By the way, I just wanna share this with you guys, after our Lit presentation, I've slept for 17 hours straight! Haha! Intense. Super bumawi lang sa tulog. You can't blame me, sleep deprived eh. ;-)

Anyway, for three meetings, Ma'am Chua was not able to supervise us in our duty. Last Tuesday, it was Sir Valdez who became our CI, yesterday it was Ma'am Manio and awhile ago, it was Sir Cantos. Yes, it's him again. Haha! ;-) Major laughtrip nanaman. Seryoso. Haven't noticed the time nga kanina, 5pm na pala, parang nag eejnoy pako. Haha! Time flies when you're having fun nga naman talaga o. But oo nga naman, dapat 6pm pa dismissal namin, but then again, he didn't know because we didn't tell. Haha! So mean. ;-) I'm the team leader for this week, and thank God hindi terror! We don't have a duty pa tomorrow, since Ma'am Chua told me na she has an important stuff to attend to. Yey!! Haha! I can totally get some Zzzz's. But then again, torture na next week, since we'll be having an 8-hour duty straight! Got lotsa papers to submit, plus we have to prepare for our case presentation asap for time is running out for we only have a month to go before the finals. Have to get ready for that. Todo sleep this weekend and inom vitamins! ;-) Guess I should start doing that now. Gotta get some sleep na. 'Til then!

UPDATE:

Hayaan nalang ang taong "namomoblema." Gusto niyang solohin ang problema niya? Fine. Yun naman gusto niya diba. Wag pilitin kung ayaw magpatulong. Kung away niya, wag niya. Simple.

I just can't believe we're back to being strangers again. Wtf*

Goodbye tears, hello happiness! ;-)

Don't fret, Karen. Everything will fall into place. Trust in God, for He won't let you down. Smile. Be happy. ;-)

+ karen +

2006-09-03T11:15:00.000+08:00

" I've learned to love somene with all my life, but there came a point when I got tired. Not of loving but of sacrificing all that I have. Then a thought came to my mind. I have given everything but have received nothing but pain and tears in return. Is this enough to prove that I really love that person? Or is it a sign telling me to stop sacrificing and learn to love myself a little more. " :-(

My friends are right. I think I should love myself a little more talaga. Enough about him. Enough about "us." Enough about love. It just won't do me any good. I would usually say to them that in the end, I know it will all be worth it, but now I'm beginning to realize that I may be so wrong to instill in me that kind of thinking. I'm so tired of all these. Yes, I must say that we were happy, we were so in love, we were complete.. but just for a short period of time. It was almost perfect, until everything turned 180 degrees. I'm broken.. broken.. broken.

Just like Brooke Davis, " I need him to need me back. " I so hate the fact that things between us are just so fucked up. Is this damage irreversible? I hope not. I wish not. I pray not.

I've done my part, and even did more than what's expected from me, but what did he do? He kept on pushing me away. It's as if I'm reaching out to nothing. Reaching out to someone who is just so blind to see my sincerity. Argh. I hate the fact that I can neither see nor feel that he's affected. :-( It's just so unfair. He is so unfair. Love is so unfair.

He better do something before everything else crumbles.

+ karen +

2006-09-02T11:20:00.000+08:00

What's up wit me? Well, after a long dreaded week of reviewing 'til morning, reading super thick books [10 chapters plus so many handouts in Pharma, 5 looooong chapters in MS plus so many handouts, powerpoint presentations with almost 200 plus slides in Sociology], memorizing 10 poems in Lit [Oh yes, fill in the blanks kasi eh], cramming, sleeping for only two to three hours, eating as fast as I could so that I could have ample time to review, going to the library, missing my favorite tv shows, forcing myself to really study instead of sleeping, going online, texting 'til I drop, and thinking about him, what we are now, and what we may be tomorrow, and so on. Finally, it's over! But then again, is it really over? I don't think so. Haha. We still have to go to school tomorrow [12 noon to 5 pm] for CPR posttest and return demonstration. Gosh. I am so not happy about that since I missed the CPR lecture two weeks ago, and I am not that confident enough to take the written exam plus the return demonstration. Why did I miss it? Because we were still in Cavite when it started, and when we got back to school, the speaker presented his last slide. Oh yes, last slide! Tsk. Sayang talaga yung P200 fee for that, and of course sayang din yung experience and all that. Hay. What else? I'm so disappointed wit all the tests that I took. I'm so disappointed wit my performance. I'm just so disappointed! Sigh. Every exam was difficult. I still used my old stratgey -- HULA! It kind of worked for me last grading period, and I am really keeping my fingers crossed that this time, it would still work. :-/ Crucial. Third year is just so hard. Not only do we have to read and understand a lot of things, but we also have to be so diligent in doing projects, assignments, presentations, etc. Plus the fact that we have a three-day-duty, 5 hours/day! Intense. What could be more dreadful?

Enough about academics. My rle mates and I watched "You are the One" awhile ago. It was more than what I've expected. It was very kilig, funny and heartbreaking. Toni Gonzaga's so pretty, adorable, funny and transparent, which made me like her more. ;-) Sam Milby's a hunk. He's gorgeous. He's yummy [hahaha! ;-)]. He's every woman would ask for. ;-) Eugene Domingo's really really funny too!! Laughtrip talaga, especially in the latter part of the movie, the part where Douglas came to their house and asked her to marry him [haha! I'm such a spoiler! I'm sorry! ;-)] Gio Alvarez was also very effective in portraying a gay character. It seemed so natural. ;-) The movie did really make me cry. Not just a simple cry, but a very intense one! Hagulgol, pare! Haha! ;-) Buti nalang I wasn't wit my someone special, otherwise I'd be so humiliated! Haha! ;-) Thumbs up to the actors and actresses and to the rest of the crew! Overall, I'm giving 4 STARS to that movie! You should watch it too, it's worth your P100 plus bucks. ;-)

Hmm. What else? I did mention "special someone" right? Well, the big question is: MERON NGA BA? I know I have been very open to my friends when it comes to my love life. I've been so open na every detail na ata eh nasasabi ko na sa mga friends ko. I just want to air out everything I've been feeling, yearning to happen, and so on. Kasi diba, why hide my feelings? Why make myself suffer by keeping all of my feelings inside? Why let people know I'm okay even if I'm not? Why pretend that I could forget about every moment my boy and I had? Why keep it all to myself, right? Eh that's why we have friends diba? To lessen the burden that we have. To be just there for us to ease all the pain away. To wipe those tears that fall down from your face. To give you a warm hug for hugs are always therapeutic. To listen to whatever we have to say. I'd like to take this opportunity to thank all of my friends, especially to those who have been really there for me to give me support, to keep me company, to listen to whatever I have to say, and to do things for me to make me become happy once again [Loudette, ikaw to! Haha! ;-) I am so thankful that I have you as one of my super close friends in college. Without you, I don't know what will happen na to me. I'm such a weak person kasi when it comes to situations like these, you know that, and you have been that only person who did everything you could to make my smile appear to my face again and to make me regain my hope and confidence that I'd still see my sunshine once again. Thanks for doing that thing, you know what I'm talking about. ;-) SUPER THANKS TO YOU! I love you! ;-)]

Moving on, dapat manunuod ako ng basketball game ng 6pm, since maglalaro mga kaibigan ko. I asked him if I could watch. He said bahala daw ako. What a reply. Asar. I asked him because I don't want to have another fight with him. Kasi iisipin nanaman niya na may hidden agenda ako. Pagod nako makipag-away. Pagod nakong i-defend sarili ko. Pagod nako sa pagharap ng sad moments. Pagod nako maghintay. Pagod nako mag-expect. Pagod nako. :-( That's why I decided not to watch the game nalang. Tapos my friends texted me bigla, kasama na pala siya sa basketball team. I don't really know why he didn't even say that to me. Para bang tinago sakin. Pero bakit naman? Ayaw ba niyang malaman ko? Ayaw ba niyang manuod ako sa mga games niya? Ayaw ba niyang maging masaya ako para saknaya? Or wala lang, ayaw lang niya, eh kasi paki ko ba? Hay. Sobrang daming questions sa mind ko ngayon. Naguguluhan ako. I need to know the answers. I need to hear it from him. He's being inconsistent once again. Now I see him, later I don't. Now I hear from him, later I don't. Now he's sweet, later he's not. Tsk. Hindi na talaga natuto. Talaga naman. I so hate it! This is too much. I'm so sick of him and love.

+ karen +

2006-08-22T08:06:00.000+08:00

I just read Gracey's blog. Golly, I so love her two entries: "He's Just Not Into You" by Greg Behrendt and Liz Tucillo & "Embrace."

I must say that some parts of "He's Just Not Into You" are so T-R-U-E. Here are some of my I-can-relate-parts:

1. He will always be able to play the "friend" card on you. He only has to be responsible for the expectations of a friend, rather than the the far greater expectations of a boyfriend. He's got the ultimate situation: a great friend with all the benefits of a girlfriend, whom he can see or not see whenever he wants to. He may be one of your closest friends, but I'm sorry to say ... as a boyfriend, he's just not that into you.

2. My friends all say I should stop talking to him, but I think he misses me, and I like that. I miss him. I feel if I stay in touch with him, it will remind him of how great I am, and eventually he will realize that we should be together again.

3. A man who wants to make a relationship work will move mountains to keep the woman he loves. If he's not calling you to tell you he loves you and wants you back, it should only be because he's showing up at your new residence to do it in person ... if he's not doing any of that, he may love you, he may miss you, but ultimately he's just not that into you. Stop taking his calls and let him know what it's like to live without you.

4. Don't be flattered that he misses you. He should miss you. You're deeply missable. Remember, the only reason he can miss you is because he's choosing, every day, not to be with you.

5. He's sniffing for something better, and when he doesn't find it, he gets lonely and comes "home." It's not that he's so into you. It's that he's so not into being alone.

6. No matter how powerful and real your feelings may be for someone, if that person cannot fully and honestly return them and therefore actively love you back, these feelings mean nothing.

7. Being lonely ... being alone ... for many people ... sucks. I get it, I get it, I get it. But still I have to say that yes, my belief is that being with somebody who makes you feel shitty or doesn't honor the person you are is worse.

I CAN RELATE. Again. Kars, magising ka na, please. He's just not into you. Sob.
Anyway, here's another one, Urbandub's Embrace. Like Gracey, I so love their lyrics too! For the record, I was never really into Urbandub, until I fell inlove with my ~~ex-boyfriend.~~ Damn. It was when I realized that their songs were not bad afterall.

Gracey, here are some of my fave lines:

Am I reaching out to nothing? Please tell me that I'm not too late Don't shut me out take back things said That were never meant…

Cuz it feels like the end of it all We're strangers again All promise is lost Cuz it feels like the end of it all Could this be the end Of something beautiful?

She's caught up in my system A good drug is so hard to find Leaving me dry renounce you off my body Cuz to be with you once more I close my eyes.

-seventeen-

Watching the world that I love crumbling down Hurting the ones that I love See their tears falling down I am weak I have failed you again

-seventeen-

Honestly, this distance is what's killing me I lied when I said waiting was fine I need you here with me now Cuz every hour hurts Except the last one kills.

You don't need to stop your world I just want you to include me These damn circumstances You didn't have to lie Why was I weak? Why did we let it go?

-seventeen-

this separation is killing me you say I should've thought that before I did what I have done so easier to put the blame on you I should've looked inside of me But it's all in vain as I try to explain She pulls away…

We could've been more Can we ever have these feelings again? We should've been more Maybe in time we'll realize that maybe Fate reveals the remedies Making it feel like it will be like the first time

Still the vision on my mind Cuz now I realize it's so damn hard to give you up no way out of this hole can we ever have us back again? let's not start and put the blame part away can you honestly say you can see me with another one? Another one, another chance with you I want more, I want more, I want more.

-seventeen-

Drive me away cuz the night just feels right take me away with you tonight anywhere with you.

-seventeen-

Is this the beginning of our last dance? Once around the floor, can we do it again? I feel the thrill from words we say, I love you.

Embrace so much tighter This could be our last together Heaven sheds tears for the wounded hearts Our forever has been torn apart

Hold me in closer, don't let go of me

-seventeen-

I'm so sick of you and love.

-seventeen-

Tears flood the streets at 3 Drowning out my broken heart Loneliness spreads it's arms It embraces me. And kills me so slowly It kills me so slowly.

Mapapaemote ka talaga sa lyrics ng Urbandub. Well, atleast I do. Haha! It's so good to know someone na gusto din ang gusto mo. *Apir* Miss you, gurlfriend!

'til then!

+ karen +

2006-08-19T10:30:00.000+08:00

Let's take it slow?

BLANKO.

+ karen +

2006-08-12T11:10:00.000+08:00

I failed to recite during our Lit class awhile ago, since I was too preoccupied reviewing for our quiz in Pharma. After reading J.H. Newman's Lead Kindly Night and John Milton's On His Blindness, I've realized two things--that we should surrender ourselves to God for he knows what's best for us, and that we should not question every challenge He's giving to us for he won't give us something beyond our ability. He may not be giving me something I've been praying for at present, but I know that He has something else to give. Something better. Something I truly deserve. I'd just have to wait for that moment, where God will let me see the beauty of His plans for me. I may be experiencing not-so-good events in my life right now, but I know that this too shall pass. I can get thru this. With God beside me, there's no need to worry. He is in control. ;-)

I want to be someone's answered prayer. I want to include that in my everyday prayer. Para maiba naman. Haha. ;-)

I also want to find a lifetime partner who'd love me like Elizabeth Barrett Browning loved her husband, Robert Browning. A love that's true.. unconditional.. immortal.

"I shall but love thee better after death." -- I so love this line. ;-)

Oh, I'm sooo lovin' Lit!! Though ang baba magbigay ng grade. Tsk. Iba talaga epekto ng mga literary pieces ni Sir. Haha. ;-)

Haay.

Anyway, my sister bought a pair of Havs with Swarovski crystals on it. Don't even bother asking about the price. It's so not worth it! Haha. ;-) *Sorry Ate Trina, it's way too pricy kasi talaga eh.*

+ karen +

2006-08-08T09:55:00.000+08:00

" If he truly loved me, he should have done something to have me back after I turned him down. Cuz no matter how cruel the situation was, if he really loved me, then he would have made a way no matter how hard the circumstance was. "

Do i need to elaborate?

I don't think it's necessary.

+ karen +

2006-07-24T16:22:00.000+08:00

I just want to share with you one of the pieces we've studied in Literature. This one's really nice. ;-) It's quite deep and it's very moving. ;-)

On Love - Kahlil Gibran

When love beckons to you, follow him,
Though his ways are hard and steep.
And when his wings enfold you yield to him,
Though the sword hidden among his pinions may wound you.
And when he speaks to you believe in him,
Though his voice may shatter your dreams as the north wind lays waste the garden.

For even as love crowns you so shall he crucify you. Even as he is for your growth so is he for your pruning.
Even as he ascends to your height and caresses your tenderest branches that quiver in the sun,
So shall he descend to your roots and shake them in their clinging to the earth.

Like sheaves of corn he gathers you unto himself.
He threshes you to make you naked.
He sifts you to free you from your husks.
He grinds you to whiteness.
He kneads you until you are pliant;
And then he assigns you to his sacred fire, that you may become sacred bread for God's sacred feast.

All these things shall love do unto you that you may know the secrets of your heart, and in that knowledge become a fragment of Life's heart.

But if in your fear you would seek only love's peace and love's pleasure,
Then it is better for you that you cover your nakedness and pass out of love's threshing-floor,
Into the seasonless world where you shall laugh, but not all of your laughter, and weep, but not all of your tears.
Love gives naught but itself and takes naught but from itself.
Love possesses not nor would it be possessed;
For love is sufficient unto love.

When you love you should not say, "God is in my heart," but rather, "I am in the heart of God."
And think not you can direct the course of love, for love, if it finds you worthy, directs your course.

Love has no other desire but to fulfill itself.
But if you love and must needs have desires, let these be your desires:
To melt and be like a running brook that sings its melody to the night.
To know the pain of too much tenderness.
To be wounded by your own understanding of love;
And to bleed willingly and joyfully.
To wake at dawn with a winged heart and give thanks for another day of loving;
To rest at the noon hour and meditate love's ecstasy;
To return home at eventide with gratitude;
And then to sleep with a prayer for the beloved in your heart and a song of praise upon your lips.

+ karen +

2006-07-24T14:10:00.000+08:00

NO CLASSES TOMORROW!! ;-)

Umiral nanaman ang pagkatamad ko. Nang malaman kong walang pasok bukas, hindi ko na tinapos yung kailangang ipasa bukas sa pharma. Haha. Ewan ko ba. Nakakatamad talaga. Umuulan pa. Ang sarap matulog. Kumain. Mag relax. Mag muni-muni. Tumulala. Manuod ng TV. Makinig sa iPod. Magtext ng sandamakmak. Mag blog. Mag multiply. Mag friendster. Haha. Na-miss ko talaga and mamuhay ng ganito. Haha. Wala lang.

Nagiging iritable nanaman ako. Hay. PMS ba ito? Haha.

Lumalakas nako kumain. Salamat. Haha. Napapansin kong marami nakong nauubos na kanin. Salamat talaga. Dati-rati, hanggang kalahating kanin lang ang nakakaya ko, ngayon, aba, grabe na. Haha. Nakakaimpluwensiya talaga ang mga nakakasama mo sa hapag-kainan. Haha. Mas ganado akong kumain ngayon kesa dati. Seryoso. Haha. Salamat sa mga taong nag impluwensya sakin. Salamat talaga.

Nag-yYM ako ngayon. Napatunayan kong "season of breakup" talaga. Natuklasan kong may naghiwalay nanamang magkasintahan. Hay nako talaga. Ganito ba talaga?? Nakakasawa na. Mga kakilala ko pa. Mga malalapit sa akin. Hay. Nakakalungkot. Nakakadismaya. Sinu-sino na ang mga susunod? Sana wala na. Tama na mga hiwalayan. Tama na. Masyado ng maraming sawi sa pag-ibig ngayon.

Nagttext din ako ngayon. Masasabi kong may "constant textmates" ako. Haha. Buti nalang andyan yung mga taong nagbibigay buhay sa tulog kong telepono. Haha. Hindi ko masyadong napapansing mag-isa na talaga ako ngayon. Kasi andyan pa mga taong nakakaalala sa akin. Alam niyo na kung sinu-sino kayo, SALAMAT talaga. Salamat din sa pagbibigay ng mga ideya kung ano ba dapat kong gawin ngayon. Gusto ko man maniwala sa inyo, di ko parin kayang gawin yan ngayon. Kasi may tiwala parin ako sa kanya at sa mga sinasabi niya sakin. Kaya pasensya na talaga kung napaka tigas ng ulo ko nanaman. Haha.

Ang lamig ng panahaon ngayon. Pati ibang tao, napakalamig din. Ewan ko ba. Sadyang ganito talaga ang buhay. Haha. Masarap din balikan ang mga masasaya at mapapait na mga alaala pag ganito ang panahon. Para bang makapag-iisip ka talaga ng maayos. Maiisip mo ang mga nagawa mo para sa taong mahal mo. Mga planong hindi natuloy. Mga surpresang hindi man lang nagawa. Mga gustong sabihin na hindi na nasabi dahil wala ng oras o huli na ang lahat. Mga gustong gawin pero hindi na umabot. Mga pagkukulang mo sa taong mahal mo. Bakit ganito? Lahat ata pagsisisi. Naisip ko din na dapat isipin din natin ang mga masasayang parte ng pag-iibigan. Hindi lang yung mga malulungkot. Nakakataba ng puso pag naaala kong nagawa niya ang lahat ng yun para sa akin. Nadama ko talaga ang pagmamahal niya. Pero ewan ko ba sakin. Bakit ako naging ganon sakanya. Pero nga, gaya ng sabi ng aking butihing kaibigang si Clarabelle, "it takes two to tango." May mga pagkukulang din siya. May mga pagkakamali. May mga kalokohan. Pero naisip ko, bakit lahat ng yun pinalampas ko? Tapos yung ako na, para bang napakasama ko ng tao. Hay. Napaka emosyonal ko na ata. Hindi ko lang talaga mapigilan ang aking sarili na maging ganito paminsan-minsan. madalas. parati. Haha. At pansin niyo ba, Tagalog to? Haha. Wala lang. Mas masarap kasi sabihin ang mga nararamdam ko pag Tagalog. Haha. Yun lang.

Gusto kong tanggalin sa kalendaryo ang Hunyo 9. Wala lang. Gusto ko lang sabihin.

Hanggang sa muli!

+ karen +

2006-07-23T15:05:00.000+08:00

I want to watch this!!! ;-) It interests me. Really. Title pa lang. Haha. ;-) Click the URL below for a movie review.

http://www.movie-reviews.colossus.net/movies/m/my_super.html

+ karen +

2006-07-23T11:15:00.000+08:00

I really like this video. It's a One Tree Hill video. It's perfect. Watch it for yourself. You might like it too. ;-) I also have another One Tree Hill video in my friendster, however, it's focus is on Brooke and Lucas only. ;-)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YWXEsw--yL4

Finally, our monthly examination week is over. I almost got sick because of too much stress. Haha. It was a HELL week. Our tests were pretty much of a guessing game. Well, for me ha. The most difficult exam I took was LITERATURE. It was really hard. Sumakit ulo't likod ko, nagkasinat, nadisamaya, nawindang, natulala, nainis at nalungkot pagkatapos ng exam. Yun lang naman ang epekto nun. Yun lang. Haha. PHARMACOLOGY was also difficult. There were a lot of numbers which I was not sure of. Kahit na may choices, mahirap parin manghula! Haha. Kakaiba. Para bang lahat ng choices, tama. Argh. And the rest? They were difficult too. Hay nako talaga. Bahala na si Superman. Haha.

Yesterday, my one nine friends and I went to the SM Mall of Asia to relax and unwind. I had SO much fun! Although I felt a little bit incomplete since Chris and I would usually go out every after our exams. Oh well. Life must go on. He has a pre-planned business anyway, so.. wala lang.. kanya kanya na talaga siguro ngayon. Nakakalungkot lang isipin paminsan. madalas. parati.

You can view our pictures.

Moving on, I had my first Malta Mission awhile ago. I REALLY had fun! Ria, Ron and I did all the dispensing of drugs. Our skill on reading the doctor's penmanship was enhanced. Haha. [Why do most doctors have a very bad handwriting? I wonder why. They give us too much burden. Don't they? Haha.] While Keshia and Chrisie [a med. student] did all the writing. It was my first medical mission wherein I didn't do any VS taking. Asenso. Haha. ;-)

You can view our pictures.

Well, as you can see, I have changed my layout. ;-) I really like the color combination. I've changed my layout in my Multiply too. I have all the time today kasi eh. Kaya yun.

Oh btw, I just want to share with you what I just read in Gracey's blog. I can totally relate with this one. Please read.

"you might be getting the wrong reason why i still hang around. don't get me wrong, i'm here not to beg for your love and attention because i myself know that it's now impossible to happen. i'm here because if it's impossible for you to love me back, the least that i can do for myself is to continue loving you. you don't have to understand that i'm doing this for myself and not for you and definitely not for anybody else.. "

-Cathrine Jane Dequito

'til then. ;-)

+ karen +

2006-07-14T06:10:00.000+08:00

" If pain must come, may it come quickly because I have a life to live and I need to live it in the best way possible. If he has to make a choice, may he make it now. Then I will either wait for him or forget him. Waiting is painful. Forgetting is painful. But not knowing which to do is the worst kind of suffering. " --Paulo Coelho

Enough said.

+ karen +

2006-07-11T06:25:00.000+08:00

It pains to pretend I don't know what he's doing.

Sh*t. Magising kana, karen..

I'm beginning to HATE him. Kaya sige.. test my patience pa.

+ karen +

2006-07-11T02:35:00.000+08:00

I'm at the library now. I'm wit Ria. She's doing some research, and I, obviously, am busy blogging. Haha! I thought about Lari, so I thought about writing something about what had happened last Saturday. So here it goes..

June 8, 2006

It was raining. Lari was in the hospital. Had to visit her, but it was raining REALLY hard. My mom told me not to go to Makati anymore, since she was too afraid that I won't be able to go home early because of the rain and heavy traffic, I suppose, and she was also afraid of me getting sick.Yet, I still went to UST McDo to meet Micah, since we decided to go to Makati Med together. On my way to the said fast food chain, I saw Gracey and Charm! I became happy and excited, but only at that moment. While I was waiting for Micah to finish her meal, a stranger accidentally spilled his cup of Coke on my back, including my hair. Yes, including my hair! I was so pissed off! I kind of yelled at the man who did the damage. I was like, "Oh my God!!!" And then, he offered me some table napkins, and yet I acted ungratefully, thinking it was not enough. It would never be enough. Even the manager handed me the same thing, and that really made me more angry, like hello?! Kaya kaya ng tissue paper yan?! Eh basang basa nga ako! Malagkit lagkit pa noh! And to think may pupuntahan pako! Pano na yan?! So I told Micah that I had to go home to bathe myself and that I told her that I don't want to go to the hospital anymore. My agony did not end there. On my way to the Dapitan gate, I've noticed that baha na! Grr talaga! I had to apply my iwas-sa-tubig baha and kapit dito, kapit doon skills. It was really a misery! But then, when I arrived home, I kind of regret being so harsh to that man. I mean, it was just an accident, and yet I over reacted. Hay. This experience of mine is totally far from what I've anticipated, yet I consider this as a blessing in disguise. Maybe there could have been more not-so-good scenarios if I still pushed through that lakad.

And then, I decided to study. Yet, as always, I fell asleep! When I woke up, my sister handed me an "all flip flops" paper bag! Obviously, it was a pair of Havaianas. Much to my surprise, it was the pair of Havs I've been eyeing on for the past couple of months, kaya lang la nako money and la na din stock pagbalik ko. I was SUPER happy! Imagine, I've forced myself to think that those Havs aren't meant for me, since I can't have it, but now, I actually have them! Yipee! I felt so guilty pa kasi nung morning, nasungitan ko pa si Ate Trina. She's really sweet and thoughtful talaga!

So that ends my entry. Until next time. ;-)

+ karen +

2006-07-10T06:57:00.000+08:00

this time what I want is you

there is no one else

who can take your place

this time you burn me with your eyes

you see past all the lies

you take it all away

I've seen it all

and it's never enough

it keeps leaving me needing you

- Take Me away --Lifehouse

w-a-i-t-i-n-g...

+ karen +

2006-07-08T15:41:00.000+08:00

I am hanging on every word you say

And even if you don't want to speak tonight

That's alright, alright with me

'Cause I want nothing more than to sit

Outside Heaven's door and listen to you breathing

Is where I want to be

- Breathing -- Lifehouse

I just love LIFEHOUSE. ;-) Song ko yan kay superchris.. ;-)

+ karen +

2006-06-30T12:15:00.000+08:00

HAPPY 18th BDAY TO PAULA RUTH SIONGCO!! ;-)

I'm sick. :-(

CORYZA attack..

+ karen +

2006-06-24T16:03:00.000+08:00

WHERE IS THE MOMENT WHEN WE NEED IT THE MOST? YOU KICK UP THE LEAVES AND THE MAGIC IS LOST.

Hi.. Hope you're reading this. This one's for you..

The Scientist - Coldplay

Come up to meet you, tell you I'm sorry
You don't know how lovely you are
I had to find you, tell you I need you
Tell you i set you apart

Tell me your secrets and ask me your questions
Oh let's go back to the start
Running in circles, coming up tails
Heads on a silence apart

Nobody said it was easy, it's such a shame for us to part
Nobody said it was easy, no one ever said it would be this hard
Oh take me back to the start

I was just guessing at numbers and figures
Pulling your puzzles apart
Questions of science, science and progress
Do not speak as loud as my heart

Tell me you love me, come back and haunt me
Oh and I rush to the start
Running in circles, chasing our tails
Coming back as we are

Nobody said it was easy, Oh it's such a shame for us to part
Nobody said it was easy, no one ever said it would be so hard
I'm going back to the start

Ohhhhhh ouuuuu
Ahhhhhh ouuuuu
Ohhhhhh ouuuuu
Ohhhhhh ouuuuu

Here's one more. Ria handed me a copy of Libre [yes, that free newspaper in LRT stations.] last Wednesday, 21st of June 2006, and asked me to read the Romance section. Surprisingly, I never felt so alone. Di lang pala ako yung may sitwasyong ganon.. Title pa lang.. patama na! So I copied some parts [well, most parts. :-)] which definitely mirror what I'm going through at present. This is a letter sent by a girl named Crisitine to Joe D' Mango. So here it goes..

" Ex Boyfriend Confuses Girl "

[Crisitne's message to Joe D' Mango]

- It could have been a great relationship, but i knew i could never go on competing with his pride.

- At that time, I thought breaking up with him was the best way for him to realize that I can also get tired.

- Plus the fact that he was already fallen out of love for me was more than I could take.

- I thought about teaching him a lesson about lessening his pride. I broke up with him. But I never thought it was going to be hard and so painful.

- I tried hard to get over him. I thought I could, but truth is, I cry almost every night because I couldn't believe it myself that I was pretending to be strong about our breakup, when in fact, I was dying inside.

- I kept thinking about how his love for me could completely disappear.

- I thought it was because of the length of time we were apart, making him forget about what we had. All this time, I just wanted him to learn his lesson, but it all ended up with me learning a lesson I didn't ask for.

- I couldn't deny the fact that my heart was shattered into pieces.

- Everyday was just really hard to bear. I realized too that I had to accept him as a friend again and just try to be with him normally, as if nothing happened. But he kept on doing sweet little things that kept me from moving on and stop hoping.

- Finally, I realized that I would go nowhere if I continued being with him and getting hurt. But I really felt that he still had feelings for me, I guess he was just too afraid to be rejected for he is a man of pride.

- I really don't understand him at all.

- All i know is that, I still love him and I am willing to give him a second chance.

- I really have no idea what to think about the two of us.

- Please help my confused heart.

[Joe D' Mangos' reply to Crisitne]

- What I see is a picture of a girl who knows what she wants and a man who can't make up his mind on what he really wants.

- What is the use of another chance to a man who doesn't really ask for it?

- If he doesn't make any conscious effort to fight for what he feels for you then you should think twice about spending the rest of your life wanting him.

- He probably remembers you only when he is lonely and alone. He enjoys being sweet to you when you're together without the benefit of any commitment.

- The pride issue will get him nowhere. You have to make him realize that if he truly wants to be with you then he should be willing to accept the consequence loving someone brings. He has to make you feel it in a manner consistent to his words and promises.

- Sometimes it is hard to understand men and how they take leaps and bounds to protect their self esteem even at the expense of people they love.

- If he cannot prove that he can commit to you then you just have to move on because he would be better off keeping his own interests than keeping his heart in a relationship that he cannot live up to.

OMG. Sounds like my story. :-( I thank Crisitne for sending her letter to Joe D' Mango. [haha!] And I would also like to thank Joe D' Mango [another haha!] for his wonderful reaction and pieces of advice to that poor girl. It served as an eye-opener on my part. I've done my part, I'll let him do his. I just hope he'll do something pleasant about it, otherwise, I'll end up wounded.. again. At night, whenever I'm about to go to sleep, I always think that what happened to us was just a nightmare, and that tomorrow, this would all return to what we used to be, but when I wake up the following morning, I end up teary-eyed and helpless, because it's reality that I've been facing, not just a nightmare nor a silly imagination, and there's nothing I could do about it anymore. Things have been said and done. Yet I'm [still] hoping that it's not yet late for remedies. [Oh well, I'm still in denial :-(]

Oh God, please heal my wounded heart. :-(

+ karen +

P.S.

I'd like to thank my friends [Mega and Lari: my love doctors; Raze-my bez; Iris-ever close friend; Ria-my bestfriend and support person in school; Cla-my favgf who would very much willing to console me whenever I cry at school; and everyone else.. you know who you are. :-)]who pretty much know the whole story, for being there for me at my lowest, for consoling my wounded heart, for really exerting an effort to make me forget what had happened, and for continuing to support me even if I'm so stubborn [you guys would constantly say that I should quit hoping, and yet I say I will but my actions speak otherwise :-)]. Thanks to all of you. In times like this, I really need you guys.. I love you all. MWAH!

2006-06-13T14:02:00.000+08:00

My Sentiments...

They say that it really hurts letting go of someone you love even if you really don't want to and having no right to say that you are hurting because it was your decision.

I concede this must be true after all.

I would be a hypocrite to say that I'm not hurting, because I am.. I truly am. I haven't heard from him, like for the entire day, and I really find it strange. But then, I guess I'd just have to face reality that some things aren't really meant to be.

Again, it was my decision, I have no right to say that I am hurting.

Anyway, there are some people I'd like to thank for being there at my lowest. They are Gracey, Lari, Mega and Patch.

Gracey: She's my puyatera friend. I can say that I'm pretty much open to her when it comes to heart problems. She listens to me talaga, kahit nonsense na sometimes. Haha! I'd like to thank her for listening to my crappy love story and for giving such wonderful pieces of advice.

Lari: She's my ka-jerk. Although she's a close friend, she does not take sides. I mean, whenever I open up my problems wit her, she says what my faults are and what's the best thing to do. As they say, true friends stab you in front. I really like her pieces of advice because they sure made a big impact on my decision-making. [Nax! Haha! But I'm serious.. She said a lot of things that really made me think 'til I go to sleep.. Ganon kalala. Ganon ka-intense. Haha!] She's my Dr. Love. She's my partner in giving Benedict [Patchoi's friend] some tips on how to deal wit his sort of love life. [Lari, bakit ganon? Ibang tao natutulungan ko, pero sarili ko, hindi ko matulungan? *Sob*] She can really make me laugh wit her funny hirits especially when it comes to spying [spying? My forte! I mean, Our forte! Haha!]. She told me that they [the two girls] aren't really goodlooking, and that they are just so ordinary. Haha! She is so funny! I'm glad we're friends. Much more glad that we're ka-jerk! I just love this girl, because wit her, I can truly be myself.

Mega: She's also my ka-jerk. She's one of the people who would, more often than not, react to the quotes I've been sending. Like she would ask me, "Ganon ba talaga yun? What if...blah blah blah." It's really funny! She learns something from me [Haha! Assuming ba? But she said so!] yet I learn a whole lot from her. [Right, Meggy? Our late night conversation? The super haba text messages that we sent to each other. Haha!] She asks me questions, ako naman answer to the max! As in we'd usually come to the point wherein damang dama na namin yung situation. Haha! I also love this girl, because she supports me all the way. And I'm really thankful for that.

Patchoi: She's my bestfriend. She's always willing to listen to my crappy stories. She supports me all the way too. Haha! She's a spy too! That's one thing I love about her. I can tell her anything under the sun. From cute and hot boys to freakin' bitches and sluts. That's my bestfriend, supporter all the way! I love her so!

+ karen +

2006-06-12T06:32:00.000+08:00

I'm done watching OTH-Season Three. I'd have to say it's a little bit tragic. Watch it for yourself. Season 4 is a thrill. Mima said that they usually air the next season on the start of fall. That would be TWO MONTHS from now. Argh. Can't hardly wait. I love Nathan, yet I love Lucas more. Haha! [Two of my present fantasies.]

+ karen +

2006-06-10T14:30:00.000+08:00

This entry is exclusively for Migs.

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THE BIG HELP! I really love this song! I owe you one.. kaya lang pagdating na ni Iris from the States, ah? Haha!

+ karen +

2006-06-08T13:12:00.000+08:00

At long last, I have One Tree Hill (Season 3) and Desperate Housewives (Season 2)!! On the contrary, they ran out of Grey's Anatomy (Season 2). Tsk. Magka-stock na kayo.. Oh Please!! I really want to have that Season two.. Nakakabitin yung Season one. Superrr. Well anyway, still have ample time to watch them all. Like hello, classes would start on the 14th pa! I'm sooo excited!! I'm loving Lucas more and more. Haha! I'm almost done wit Desperate Housewives.. I just love Gabrielle! She's just so amazing! =) I'm into Korean films as well. Haha! I'm thinking of buying "Now Dating" or "Dating Now." [I can't really remember if it's Now Dating or the other way around. Haha!] Nothing really. I just find it kilig and funny.

What an entry!! Haha!! Just wanna share what made me uber happy today. =)

'til then. Cheerio!

** I want to watch The Lake House. Seems awesome! **

+ karen +

2006-06-04T11:05:00.000+08:00

HEY GIRL! I HOPE YOU'RE READING THIS. YOU JUST WON'T STOP TALAGA NOH?? TRY AND TRY UNTIL YOU DIE!

+ karen +

2006-05-27T14:14:00.000+08:00

WONDERFUL LIFE = EXTRAORDINAIRE

It's basically about Han Seung Wan (Daniel) being in love with his HS sweetheart, Lee Chae Young (Cynthia). Apparently, this lady is also in love with the rich boy, Min Do-Hyeon (Henry) *In short, two-timer!* Min Do-Hyeon had "something" for her too, until he met Jeon Se-Jin (Sabrina), who is secretly in love with Han Seung Wan.

It talks about responsibility, love, family, friendship, trust, honesty, courage, hope, faith, unity, acceptance, marriage and determination.

It was really heart-rending. Watchng it on DVD is a whole lot better than following it on TV. Why? Because apart from the fact that it has no commercial breaks, thus, the excitement or thrill is continuous, (In short, hindi bitin!) you can feel the intensity of the story and you can easily discern it better. The only drawback for me is that you are required to read the English translation (Since it's in Korean, well unless if you CAN understand Korean language =D) all throughout the story (Whew! 16 episodes, quite tiring!) otherwise you wouldn't comprehend it at all. Sometimes, the subtitle's delayed pa which makes it more difficult. But despite the hurdle, I enjoyed the "thrill" of reading as fast as I could and everything else. I'm also bothered by the fact that (my) attention has to be divided in some way--reading the translation and watching the whole scenario per se.

It was different from what I've expected. It's no ordinary and predictable. It has sense and it's really worth watching on a huge screen. I strongly recommend this film because it's not just very entertaining, it's very educational too. It can also build a good character. ;)

Being respnsible for one's actions, being contented and grateful for everything you have, being true to yourself and to others, being able to set your priorities straight, being able to know your limitations, being able to love unconditionally and above all, being able to enjoy life to the fullest. These are some of the manifold values this film aims to inculcate the viewers.

I'm looking forward to watching another film like this, or better yet, MORE of this kind. This is more than the usual, I'm telling you. ;) So if you have something to recommend, please leave a message. I'd appreciate it a lot! Thank you! ;)

Interested?
click here for more details.

+ karen +

2006-05-22T17:43:00.000+08:00

Hello Friends & Strangers! It's 2:01am on my watch, and still I'm wide awake! Haha! I've been asleep already at around 10pm, early huh? But then my mum woke me up. Err. I told her to wake me up 'cause I gotta do something for my sister. (Damn.. pag bunso nga naman.. Haha!) Good thing she remembered, or else I'll give my sissie a headache.. again. Haha! Since I'm still waitng for Gracey's reply, just gonna answer a survey to kill time. I love doin' non-sense things.. like this. wtf* BUT WHO CARES? I'm damn bored. So here it goes..

> 1. Do you know anyone's friendster pasword?
> - Yes. My Bf's. Haha! Pahirapan pa yun huh. =D (But then, Gf's really have to know, right? So dapat hindi pahirapan.. Err. Sorry, Chino, your excuse is invalid! Haha!)
>
> 2. Do you think ur love life right now will last long?
> - No. But I'm hoping.
>
> 3. Are u an emotional person?
> - Yeah. Ask my closest friends on earth! or my family. They sure can tell.
>
> 4. State every person you were with today:
> - Mum. Ate Trina. Ate Kathy. Ate Clarita. My Bf (in my dream..haha! How corny can I get)
>
> 5. TV show you miss watching?
> - One Tree Hill (Still don't have the 3rd Season. Err.) Desperate Housewives (Damn. La pa din akong 2nd Season. Double Err.)
>
> 6. Borrowed stuff from your friends you still have
> with you?
> - YESSSS. Haha! I borrowed 2 yearbooks from a friend in LSGH way back in HS. Well, the other one is still with Marikar, while the other one is still in my cabinet. Haha! And not to mention, I still have his Adidas (?..basta the yellow, white and black thing..haha!) bag. Haha! Soooo Funny!
>
> 7. What was the last thing you did?
> - Ate Lucky Charms cereals fresh from Subic. =)
>
> 8. Who is right next to you?
> - No one.
>
> 9. Who was the last person you ate with and
> where?
> - Hmm.. I ate with my two sisters and my mum at our dining table.
>
> 10. How many times was your page been viewed?
> - The last time I checked it (a week ago), 150+.
>
> 11.How's the weather right now?
> - It's cool.
>
> 12.Last person you called today?
> - My Mum's friend. I called him up for my Mum.
>
> 13. Last person who called you?
> - Kathryn Lizbeth Siongco. (Well, she's the only one I'm talking to on the landline this summer.)
>
> 14.Last song you sang?
> - Be my world. (Ooooh. I'm starving without your loving with your kisses you can fill me now. Ooooh. Come closer. Don't wait a minute you are the outcome c'mon and be my world...)
>
> 15. Last time you danced?
> - After taking a bath. Haha!
>
> 16. Last car you rode in?
> - My sister's.
>
> 17. Smoked?
> - I don't smoke. Eeew-ness! Yellow teeth, purple lips, bad health, & bad breath? NO THANKS!
>
> 18. Dumped someone before?
> - Haha! I guess. =S I'm too nice kasi eh, I don't really let people feel that they are being dumped. --Haha! Really now. =D
>
> 19. Been really depressed before?
> - YESSS. Definitely.
>
> 20. Faked being sick to miss school?
> - Yeah. Haha! My sisters say that I'm Hypochondriac.
>
> 21. What time did you wake up today?
> - 2pm. Haha! I just ate my late lunch, then went back to sleep.
>
> 22. Current taste?
> - Sweet? Haha!
>
> 23. Do you like the person who sent u dis?
> - I don't even know her. Haha!
>
> 24. What are you wearing right now?
> - A shirt and a pair of shorts. I'm also wearing my sister's colorful headband. =D
>
> 25. Are you too shy to ask anyone out?
> - If asking a boy out, of course! I still go for the traditional style.
>
> 26. Over the past months has anybody tried to
> court you?
> - Hello? I'm taken. Why would anyone still court someone who's already taken? People with no conscience do that, I guess.
>
> 27.where are u now?
> - At home.
>
> 28.WHAT DATE IS IT?
> - 22.05.06
>
> 29.WHAT TIME DID U SLEEP LAST NIGHT?
> - 6am. Haha! Like Gracey, I'm also Puyatera.
>
> 30.DID U GO SOMEWHERE YESTERDAY?
> WHERE?
> - Yes. The Church and SM San Lazaro.
>
> 31. WHAT DID U DO THERE?
> - I heard mass and I accompanied my sister and Mum.
>
> 32. how old are u?
> - I'm already 19.
>
> 33. ARE YOU IN LOVE RIGHT NOW?
> - Of course.
>
> 34. WHY OR WHY NOT?
> - Because if I'm not, then I wouldn't be in a relationship right now.
>
> 35. ARE YOU HAPPY WITH YOUR LAST LOVE?
> - Last love? Hmm.. YES.
>
> 36. LAST PERSON WHO SENT YOU A MSG ON
> FRIENDSTER
> - Topher.
>
> 37. DO U LIKE YOUR SCHOOL?
> - UST? Okay lang.
>
> 38. DO U LIKE BOOKS?
> - NO. I'm allergic to books. Haha. Well, old books.
>
> 39. DO U WANT TO GET MARRIED
> - Yes, but not now.
>
> 40. WITH WHOM?
> - Still searching for the right one. =D
>
> 41.ARE U SPOILED?
> - No. I'm just well taken care of.
>
> 42. HOW ARE YOU FEELING RIGHT NOW?
> - BORED. Super BORED.

That's it? Ugh. Haha. Still want more!! Anyway, I wanted to go to the Mall of Asia a while ago, but then Marikar told me that super dami daw ng tao. So I guess I'll just go there next time. *I miss you Grannyyyy!!*

Oh btw, I'd like to thank Graceyyy for giving me so many hugs! Love you, girl!

That would be all for now. Cheerio!

+ karen +

2006-05-20T13:14:00.000+08:00

First of all, I would like to say that I am so touched that I've got so many hugs when I logged-in! ;) From 14 Hugs to 30 hugs in a span of 2 days?! What a lovely surprise! ;) ME = uber happy! I've been sick since Tuesday. Lovesick? Perhaps. Haha! ;) Good thing someone takes care of me, my dearest Mum. =D *aaaww* Anyway, so if you guys wanna make me happy, JUST GIVE ME A HUG.. MORE HUGS ;) *laughs*

Second of all, I would like to share with you guys some killer quotes from my dear friends. I can truly relate with these quotes.. Go figure! ;)

Sometimes we wish to close are eyes and never wake up. The world is just too harsh. But have you ever thought that there is one person who wishes to wake up every morning just to see you?
** Well, guess who's that ONE PERSON I'm talking about. ;) **

To realize the value of 1 year, ask a student who failed a grade. To realize the value of 1 month, ask a mother who gave birth to a premature baby. To realize the value of 1 week, ask the editor of a weekly newspaper. To realize the value of 1 hour, ask the lovers who are waiting to meet. To realize the value of 1 minute, ask a person who just missed the train. To realize the value of 1 second, ask a person who just avoided an accident. Treasure every moment. Today is a gift, that's why it is called PRESENT.
** Nothing to explain. It's pretty much simple. **

Some of relationships end with different kinds of reasons. But when all has been said and done, they have 1 thing in common: They are shooting stars; a spectacular moment of light in the heavens; a fleeting glimpse of eternity.. And in a flash, they're gone.
** This is really TRUE. It was almost perfect until this freakin' lady entered the picture! But then, that little "something" we had will ALWAYS be remembered! It was quite short, I guess (even if it reached more than a year), but it was definitely beautiful! ;)**

Sometimes, we never seem to be contented of what we have. We were given good but we keep on seeking for the best which sometimes leads us to missing the simple yet satisfying part of this journey. Just like in love, we set requirements, we target the ideal, so where do we end up? We end up hoping that the ones we left behind still have spaces for us, 'cause the 1 we thought to be ideal doesn't seem to see us that way. What an irony.. but i guess that is the reality.
** TRUE TRUE. I've been to that point already. I've had "it" yet I've wished for better ones, when in reality, the one I had is and will always be the BEST one, I suppose. ;) **

Hey, I'm not just talking about my love life alone, huh. Hehe! Wala lang. Just wanted to share something! ;)

** EXCERPTS FROM A WARM CUP **

I nod. Looking at the way you hesitate to take my hand, resting so near yours, I know you've already gone. I will make it easy for both of us, I tell myself. I will forget the feel of your hands on my skin. I will smile and tell you that I'm happy for you because tht's what you want to hear and that's what you want to believe. I will not hope you will back soon nor say that I wish I was going with you. Instead, I will keep in mind that there is nothing between us anymore. It's just that the coffee is too warm, and I am so cold.

That would be all for now. Gotta chat wit my friends na! Cheerio! ;)

+ karen +

PS: I'm addicted to Grey's Anatomy, House MD and Wonderful Life! And ofcourse, Smallville, One Tree Hill and Desperate Housewives will always be on my top 3 Faves ;)

2006-05-13T19:08:00.000+08:00

NEW LAYOUT!! Well, it's not actually new *laughs* I just modified it. This was my first layout when I started blogging. *thanks to Jing!*

Since I wanna post something today, I wanna share with you what I have read just now. Here it goes:

Pick the MONTH that you were born:

---------------OCTOBER-------------------
Loves to chat. Loves those who love them. Loves to take things at the center. Inner and physical beauty. Lies but doesn't pretend. Gets angry often. Treats friends importantly. Brave and fearless. Always making friends. Easily hurt but recovers easily. Daydreamer. Opinionated. Does not care to control emotions. Unpredictable. Extremely smart, but definitely the hottest AND sexiest of them all.

Most traits are quite true, I must say. *haha*

Here's another one:

Girl: I'm always here for you
Boy: I know
Girl: What's wrong?
Boy: I like her so much
Girl: Talk to her
Boy: I don't know.
She won't ever like me
Girl: Don't say that. You're amazing.
Boy: I just want her to know how I feel.
Girl: Then tell her.
Boy: She won't like me
Girl: How do you know that?
Boy: I can just tell
Girl: Well just tell her.
Boy:What should I say
Girl: Tell her how much you like her
Boy: I tell her that daily
Girl: what do you mean?
Boy: I'm always with her. I love her.
Girl: I know how you feel. I have the same problem.But he'll never like me
Boy: Wait. Who do you like?
Girl: Oh some boy
Boy: Oh... she won't like me either.
Girl: She does
Boy: How do you know..
Girl: Because, who wouldn't like you?
Boy: You
Girl: You're wrong, I love you.
Boy: I love you too.
Girl: So are you going to talk to her?
Boy: I just did.

AAWW.. isn't it? *laughs* Wala lang! 'til then! Gotta sleep already. *yawn*

+ karen +

2006-05-12T19:16:00.000+08:00

Truth is..

We hide because we wanna be found..

We walk away to see who follows..

We cry to see who wipes away the tears..

And we let our hearts be broken..

.. to see who comes and fixes it..

This is so true. *sigh*

I tried to walk away but he followed me.

It has alsmot reached to a "period" but then his perseverance and sincerity led us to "elipses" instead.

+ karen +

2006-05-10T08:48:00.000+08:00

Bitterness.

I have finally known the meaning of bitterness when I have discovered the worth of an old doll. I've owned that doll for two years and a couple of months. When it was still new, I would usually cuddle it, would usually give my utmost love and care, and would usually give my 100% attention. I was excited of owning such doll. Most girls, as they say, envied me for having that doll. When I grew tired of doing the same things to the doll, I've become hungry to own new dolls. Not just one, but a couple of them. I was seeking more happiness at that time. I never really thought about what I could lose, knowing that my old doll will just be by my side, or will constantly be around. So when I finally saw this amazing doll, not so physically attractive unlike my old doll, but new and interesting. My attention has been focused to the new one. Yes, I was happy, but only for a short period of time. When I've realized that my new doll can't give me the same happiness that my old doll can give, I've decided to switch again my attention to my old doll. But unfortunately, it was already taken away from me by someone who noticed my old doll's beauty and perfection when my glance was somewhere else. Now, I can see that my old doll is certainly happy with its new owner. Even if I still want that doll, all I could do for now is to stare at it, and wish that things between us will go back to the way it used to be. I just want to say sorry for taking that doll for granted and for not loving that doll as much as it loved me. Hopefully, my old doll will understand me and would still love me despite and inspite of everything. (Oh, I just miss the old times..) And if that time comes, I wouldn't wish or even look at other dolls around me again. But then, making that wish come true is really close to impossible. =( But then again, if we are really meant to be, we will be together again.. in time. I could only hope for the best.

That event surely made me realize a lot of things. It made me realize that I should always be contented on what I have and be thankful for everything God has given me. Losing that doll and realizing my loss could only prove how stupid I was to look some place else when in reality, the only thing that can make me truly happy was just right there beside me. At that time, I was seeking for better dolls, without even noticing that the doll that used to me mine, is and will always be the best I could possibly have.. & I was really stupid to haven't noticed that.

Too late for regrets. Until then.

+ karen +

2006-04-30T15:30:00.000+08:00

Two big events for the day (29.04.06): 19th Birthday of Kathryn and My sissie's Graduation!

Pictures of Kate and Moi.. ;) *Happy Birthday seatmate! love.hugs.mwah!*

(oh yes, she's one of my great picture partners..*haha*)

Some pictures taken during my sister's grad in PICC and in Westin Philippine Plaza Hotel slash Hotel Philippine Plaza.. ;)

PICC..

SPIRAL Buffet.. *YumYum* This is my favorite place..

We attended my sister's grad in PICC from 7am until 11am. Finally, I have a sister who's now a doctor. *yey!!!* We had lunch in Westin at around 11:20am. The buffet was so delicious! There were really a lot of choices! The dishes were from all over the country.. I just can't say anything else now about the food but "DELICIOUS!" I wanted to try almost all of the dishes served, yet I was afraid of one thing--GLUTTONY. Haha! Then we went home to get some sleep. Next, we went to GB3 to eat dinner at Recipes. We were wit some of my sister's friends. It was really nice seeing Andrew once again! I really missed him.. our crazy talk, issues, bonding sessions, ayih sessions, and more. ;) Anyway, more details.. later! Gotta catch some sleep.. 'til then.. ;)

+ karen +

2006-04-26T13:54:00.000+08:00

I'm missing Bohol already. *sob* Today's my Baby Neil John's birthday, and it's sooo sad that I won't be able to attend his party. I won't be able to see him in his party attire holding his huge balloon and blowing his birthday candles.. Aaw.. I envy the people present on his special day.. *sob* He called me up on the phone a while ago, and I really missed talking to him.. I missed our crazy talk. :( I also miss his cute pets. Haha. ;) And our little games too.. Hmm.. I wanna see him again.. waaa. I miss my BaBy!!

***

Some things I wasn't able to do in Bohol:

- be wit my friends there.. go to the beach.. or wherever.. just wanna catch things up..

- go to that Resort I've been planning to visit

- have a serious conversation wit an old friend.. I wanna clear things out.. everything is just a BLUR. Oh well. Maybe it was just not the perfect time.. Now I'm wondering.. when's going to be the PERFECT time???

***

I really enjoyed my 10-day-vacation! Although I saw some disgusting people within the duration of my stay there, it's not even worth it to spoil my vacation. PERFECT TAN.. thanks to the people who noticed.. because I really worked hard for it! Haha! ;) Thanks too for the people who appreciated my henna.. haha.. ;) THE BEACH.. waa. white sand. paradise! THE FOOD.. incredibly delicious! THE PEOPLE.. well, excluding the bitches and the jerks, all have been very nice and friendly! ;)

IT WAS JUST SO AMAZING!!

:: I know you guys are just after the attention. If there's one thing I hate besides bitches and jerks, it's fakers! ::

+ karen +

2006-04-21T10:00:00.000+08:00

I wake up I wash my face and go here's another day, I'm sure I'll fight for what I love and my music keeps going on my heart begins to beat and my music keeps going on it makes my life complete I'm flying away, I'm flying away I'm flying away, I'm flying away It's the sound I cannot live without as the rhythm goes, I'm sure my soul will never pause and my music keeps going on it opens up my eyes and my music keeps going on 'cause one day I was blind I'm flying away, I'm flying away I'm flying away, I'm flying away I'm flying...I'm flying away

- Flying away

all around that's me, many troubles I need you now to be close to me there's world round and round, round a circle don't know how it wouldn't beooo, I'm starving without your loving with your kisses you could fill me now ooo, come closer don't wait a minute, you are the outcome c'mon and be my world na na na, na na na na na na na na na, na na na na na na na na na and I love to watch you when you're walking along but there's nothing I can say to make you feel the same way all I see is your face in the mirror fall into an ocean for me, on and dive na na na, na na na na na na na na na, na na na na na na na na na na na na, na na na na na na na na na, na na na na na na na na naooo, I'm sorry without your loving ooo, come closer don't wait a minute, you are the outcome c'mon and be my world na na na, na na na na na na na na na, na na na na na na na na na

- Be my World

+ karen +

2006-04-15T13:27:00.000+08:00

i'M 62% GiRLiE =)
Take this quiz and find out how girly you are.Put x beside each thing that's true.
Each x thatyou put is one percent.
[x] my fingernails/toenails are almost alwayspainted
[x] during the summer pretty much the only shoes iwear are flip flops
[x] my favorite toy as a child were barbies
[x] my favorite color is pink or purple
[] i did Gymnastics
[x] i love skirts!
[] hollister is my favorite place to shop
[x] tight jeans are the only jeans i'll wear
[x] i love chocolate
[x] i've never had a real job
[x] my hair is straightened
[x] i have at least 8 myspace/friendster pictures
[x] i usually go shopping at least once a week
[x] i love to hang out at the mall with friends
[] i have a real diamond ring or diamond necklace
[] i've had at least 5 boyfriends/girfriends
[] i've gone to a tanning salon
[x] i go to the beach to tan - not to swim
[x] i have at least 10 pairs of shoes
[x] i watch either the OC or Laguna Beach
[] i change my icon weekly
[] i would NEVER step foot into Hot Topic
[x] my cell phone might as well become a part ofme
[] i wear eye shadow, mascara, or cover upeveryday
[] i've been or am on a diet
[x] bathing suits are adorable!
[] i dont know the difference between a sheep and a goat.
[x] big sunglasses are hott
[x] i have gotten my nails done
[x] i own over 10 purses
[X] MTV is my one of my favorite channels
[x] all i want to do at sleepovers is talk aboutboys/girls
[x] i love to have other girls do my hair
[x] i give and receive hugs from all my friends
[x] i hate bugs, snakes, lizards, spiders
[x] carnivals are so fun!!
[x] summer is THE best season
[x] my swimsuit has 2 pieces
[x] im waiting for my knight in shining armor
[x] musicians are so hot
[x] if you write me a poem or tell me im beautiful,im all yours
[x] i am self-conscious.
[] i cry often
[] my car smells like vanilla
[] my dishes get washed more then once a week
[x] i dont do sports
[x] i HATE to run
[x] i squeal when i am surprised or angry
[x] i eat dried fruit as a snack
[x] i love romance novels
[] drew Barrymore is so cute
[] i dance a lot.
[x] i usually spend over an hour to get ready to leave my house
[] i only have like 5 billion hair products
[x] i love to get dressed up.
[x] every part of my outfit needs to match
[x] i talk on the phone at least once a day to my friends
[x] i would love to have a photo shoot of myself
[x] price on clothes hardly matters
[] i apply lip gloss 200 times a day
[x] i wish i were a model
[x] i wish i could meet Paris Hilton
[x] i have been something that was semi slutty onhalloween
[] i own Uggs
[x] Hip Hop is the best music
[x] i pop my collar
[] i like to be the center of attention
[] guys with Mohawks are crazy
[] horses are beautiful but i would never ride one
[] i'd rather not pay attention in school
[] cats are adorable
[] i write poems or my own music
[x] i love it when a guy/girl wears good smellingcologne/perfume
[x] i can get very jealous
[x] i would love to visit Hawaii
[x] Valentine's day is so cute!
[] white is better then black
[] i wouldn't be caught dead in all black
[x] my closet is STOCK FULL of clothes
[x] i hate the grunge look of a beard
[x] i love to read gossip magazines
[x] i love to gossip
[x] I had Lisa Frank folders, posters as a kid
[] i love Celine dion
[] My bubble baths are 3 hr long
[] my wedding only needs a groom it's already planned
[] my friends and i are in a strict group. we mostly only hang out with each other
[x] i like kids
[] diet drinks are the best
[] i'm all about being vegetarian
[] i refuse to eat at McDonalds
[x] i check my myspace everyday. (friendster)
[x] i LOVE life!
[] i have a lot of jewelry!
[] claires has cheap jewelry
[] my screen names have x's in them
[] either one of my my space names has <3/?'s>
[x] i would never want to be the opposite sex
[x] it's not what he/she said it's the way he/shesaid it
[x] i have more than 3 pillows

hErE's mOrE..

finish the statement with the first thingthat pops into your head...

my ex is: non-existent.
i lost my: pair of shorts? so last summer.
maybe i should: already sleep.
i love: my family, friends, by and God.
i don't understand: why by wants to replace his picture in friendster wit my pic wit some other boy.
people say i am: mataray and maarte at first glance. but i'm NOT maarte, mataray siguro.. hehe..
love: is everywhere.
somewhere, somehow: i'll find the man that will make me the happiest.
i will always: be a fighter. well, in terms of arguing wit someone.
forever is: just a dream.
i never want to: hurt others.
i think the current president is: super wise.
every morning: is a blessing.
life is: full of complexities.
three things about my past:
:: beautiful
:: not-so-beautiful
:: lessons have been learned
i get annoyed when: people act like someone they're not and people who are so assuming and feeling!
i wish: that all my wishes will come true. *grin*
it would be nice: to spend an entire day wit my loved one at the beach. just enjoyin' each other's company. simple.
tomorrow: i'll be off to Bohol. *hurrah!*
i really want to: become a doctor/nurse, lawyer and a professional photographer in the near future.
if i had a gigillion dollars: i would share it wit our less-fortunate brothers and sisters and i'll shop for myself and for my loved ones.

+ karen +

:: I've had one of the most meaningful conversations ever wit my dearest close pal, Marikar Mondero, a while ago. She indeed inspired me and made me realize that there's no such thing as a "master in love." Granny, always remember that everyone deserves a chance, and don't be too conservative because you'd probably miss out the close-to-best things in life. =) I missed you big time! Looking forward to more exciting conversations wit you.. mWaH! ::

2006-04-14T17:30:00.000+08:00

LOVE YOU.. HUGS and MWAHS..

+ karen +

:: I saw this pic at Arvie's multiply ::

* The Christmas Batch *

OUR DAYS WEEKEND (Pollock, ADMU)

I JUST MISS HIGHSCHOOL.. Although I'm not active in Days, That three-day-sort of retreat will always be remembered. ;)

2006-04-14T10:23:00.000+08:00

Today's Maundy Thursday. We weren't able to go on a Visita Iglesia since one of my sisters has a duty today (2pm-10pm), so what we did nalang was visit the church and prayed nalang (stations of the cross). After that, on our way to McDo, NAHULOG AKO SA CANAL! Haha! CRUCIAL! It was so humiliating! When my right leg got stucked on the canal, all I was able to do was stare at my Havaianas floating on the dirty water. I was in shock. I never thought that it would really still be possible to get my Havs out of that dirty water. Thanks to my sister for getting it for me!I know she's maarte, that's why when she volunteered to get it for me, I was really touched! As in! Anyway, I was laughing and laughing, until I felt my leg started to ache. :( It was really terrible, but still, thank God I only had a scratch. So we went to the ward where my sister works, and brought her icecream, and told her what I've been through! All she was able to say was, "Yuck!!! Gusto mo ng sterilium?!" Haha. Very funny! That's the HIGHLIGHT of my day! Crucial! Well, speaking of Havaianas, my mum and I went to Makati yesterday to buy a dozen of Havs. Yes, a dozen. Haha! Talk about addiction! Well, those 12 pairs weren't all for me by the way! Haha! But I wish they were. Haha! I finally bought the one I've been eyeing for before I went to Batangas, and to my surprise, may stock pa! and last pair na! Yey! Haha! Those were really for me! ;) I can remember pa nga na when I was holding that pair of Havs, there's this lady who asked me if I'll buy it pa daw, 'cause if not, she'll buy it, so I never had hesitations! Haha! Super CRUCIAL. Tapos I saw the owner of J.O. pa.. pareho kami ng binili! I am so flattered! Haha! So 'til here nalang. Just wanna share the canal thingy!

Oh btw, here are some things that happened to me in the past few days..

Monday: I was scolded by my mother dearest. It was terrible. Iba talaga magalit mother ko. Marikar saw my mum got mad na.. di ba, granny? Hehe!

Tuesday: My mum was still mad at me. She got all my things. As in ALL. Gadgets, money, etc.

Wednesday: As soon as we got home from Makati, I finally had all my things back! Yey! ;)

+ karen +

2006-04-09T08:25:00.000+08:00

IT WAS A SUCCESS GUYS. THANKS TO THE FOLLOWING PEOPLE:

* 2-8 'o5-'o6 *
jinggay
fred
kams
raydon
kesh
kson
cat
soraya
raze
albert
alexis
michelle
mj
loudette
omar
migs

* 2-6 'o5-'o6 *
hannah
alvin
jean
rob
cess
bea
karen
dhessie
abbie
almira
dindin
carla

* QC Science Hisgh School Batch '04 *
ags
aurora
jason tei
kamela
tsabi
donna
rona selina
kate

* JERKS *
lari&jp
clara
marikar
mega
iya
ann
sam
patch
steph
mara

* RLE 3 *
kate
ria
aeron
kris
justin

* 2-9 'o5-'o6 *
cla
janelle
leigh
caroline
chai

* other friends *
carol&peli
paula
art
christine

* sisters *
canny
ate trina
ate kat

Without you, it wouldn't be possible. THANKS again!

+ karen +

2006-04-07T13:00:00.000+08:00

After 2.5 hours of standing and waiting for my turn, I finally got my 2nd sem grades!! Waaaa! I'm pretty much happy wit my grades!!! I soo hate NUTRITION! Come to think of it, the subject ain't hard to understand.. kung may nagtuturo! haha! kidding! Well, I have nothing against our prof naman, but then, Nutrition lowest ko! Argh. *bitter* Oh well! I'm still happy! And will be happier if 1st and 2nd sem grades won't be combined! 'til then! ;)

Oh btw, before ending this entry, allow me to thank some people, namely:

Alexis: for the support and cooperation you've given me! Not to mention, your very bright idea of what my Plan B will be. ;) I think it's better pa nga eh, I mean, no too much hassle on my part, on his part, and on you guys too. I LOVE YOU!

Migs: for the support and cooperation as well.. and for listening to my mushy ideas! haha! thanks to you! O ayan na ah, makakapagtennis ka na! Hehe ;)

Omar: for the cooperation as well. even if it was against your will.. kasi nga db, cheesy? haha! thanks nonetheless!

And everyone else who participated in this whole event, my JERKS, my blockmates, my 1-9 '04-'05 family, 2-6 '05-'06 (Especially ROB), QC Science High School Batch '04 people, and of course, my dear family.

I LOVE YOU ALL FROM THE BOTTOM OF MY HEART!

+ karen +

2006-04-06T15:47:00.000+08:00

THE WORLD OF ZIPS

(ctrl + C + ctrl + V)

WHAT ARE ZIPS?
Put together a piece of string, a little bit of weight and a large splash of color. Now make sure that they are chosen from the highest quality imported materials and are aerodynamically tested for optimum twirling fun and you've got yourself a pair of ZIPS! ZIPS are guaranteed to last through hours of play on the beach, the park and even your own house! Children and adults alike can't get enough of the waves of bright colors, the cool tricks and the "ooohs" and "aahs" of everyone watching. Yes, ZIPS have finally arrived and are here to stay!

WHERE DID ZIPS COME FROM?
ZIPS were inspired by the Maori dance of "Poi." The Maoris were the native people of New Zealand and "Poi" is their word for "ball on a cord." These innately cool people used rocks flung from flax rope to train their warriors and for the women to attract a partner. Poi has been part of the Maori culture for centuries and fire sets have been created recently to give a more intense performance. ZIPS are a safer alternative to tossing fire around your body and are just as amusing and beneficial!

I really want one of these!!! It's a must-have this season! It's perfect for summer.. especially when you're at the beach! Simply GORGEOUS!

For more details:

http://planetzips.com

+ karen +

2006-04-03T22:16:00.000+08:00

Finally, I've told him about what kept on bothering me for a couple of days! Yes, it really did take me a lot of courage to confess. Whew. But after that, I didn't entertain his messages for a while.. I just hope he'll do something about it! Anyway, I can say that I'm pretty much productive this day. Why? Because instead of sleeping, I arranged my clothes in the cabinet, cleaned our room, went to the mall to buy some stuff, looked if the swimsuit is still there (oh my, just hope it will still be there when my Ate comes back to buy it for me! Haha! Thanks Ate Trina in advance! ;p), watched teleseryes while cutting papers! Haha! I did all those things to divert my attention. I have been bothered by a lot of things lately, and when Kate sent me a text saying that our grades are already out in the Main Bldg., I've been much bothered pa! Haay. I don't wanna prolong my agony, I'll probably go to school tomorrow to check my grades, well, that is if I wake up early and if I won't be too lazy. Haha. Oh well.. I just wish that my grades are all okay. Haha. Asa. But then, a girl can always hope. 'til then! ;)

KATE: Thanks so much for being there when I need you! And thanks for the support! Grabe. MWAH!
FRED: Ai dear! You've flooded my inbox with your R18 messages ah?! Haha! They were all funny, by the way! Haha! MWAH!
KAMS: I just hope that our Tagaytay escapade will be a success this time! Haha! MWAH!
FAVE GF: Haha! Got nothing else to do, honey! Net 'til I drop! Haha! Miss you! MWAH!
JING: Miss you too, Jing! Keep in touch! Goodluck kay -toot- Haha! MWAH!

+ karen +

2006-04-03T06:20:00.000+08:00

LOVE AND RELATIONSHIP 101:

"There's always a possibility that a person can get attracted to another. It's human nature. It's not wrong. But that's why you're in a committment, you discipline yourself. One may get attracted to numerous prospects and it's okay, as long as you don't nurse the feeling and won't do something about it. Borderline between cheating and faithfulness. Recognize the reality that you already have the person that can give you more than what you get from the cheap thrills of attraction."

+ karen +

2006-04-02T01:06:00.000+08:00

Thanks Katey for enlightening me. =) Maybe it's not yet the right time to do that thing to him. Sa isip ko nalang muna yung "surprise" na ganun. Haay. Miss you parnter! MWAH!

+ karen +

2006-04-01T18:44:00.000+08:00

It's already 2:29 in the morning. Still, I'm here, blogging. I can't sleep. Well, I choose not to sleep yet. Haha. I wanna upload our La Luz pictures on my Multiply! Excited?! Haha! Oh well. So what happened to me today? Well, as always, slept for long hours, and when I woke up, I watched my all-time-fave-teleseryes! Oh yes! Haha! I haven't been eating rice since forever, until at dinner time. The food was so hard to resist! Really. I ate a lot of rice. PG? Haha! I missed eating. =( I haven't gotten the urge to eat since my hearty started to pain, once again. I just can't figure out why it's so damn hard to forget what I did to him?! It seems as if I committed a crime. NOT! Well, much worse than that. He has this unique way of making me feel guilty more and more each day. But then, I've had enough! I think it's about time to finally quit "panunuyo." It was never my intention to hurt him anyway, so why do I have to go through all of these? Right? Oh well. Enough of being an angel here. I didn't mean it naman eh. End of discussion.

I've watched The Corpse Bride and Monster-in-Law (full length) a while ago. I must agree wit Topher that the movie, Corpse Bride, was kind of creepy just by looking at the characters. Haha. Well, the title says it all. =) Monster-in-Law was nice. It was very funny! I just hope that in time, I won't have an evil mother-in-law. Haha.. Katakot eh. ;)So there. 'til then.. ;)

I MISS MY RLE THREE.. HOPE TO SEE AND BE WIT YOU GUYS SOON..

+ karen +

2006-03-31T22:03:00.000+08:00

18 Beautiful quotes in my inbox =)HAPPY READING. =)

"You can erase someone from your mind Getting them out of your heart is another story." -- Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind

If your heart gets broken it's not a sin to cry, it's not a crime to mourn, but it's not right to ruin your own life because in love, you should know when to move on, if there's nothing to hold on for.

"Sometimes when you sacrifice something precious, you are not really losing it. You are just passing it on to someone else." -- The Five People You Meet in Heaven

If you don't go after with what you want, you'll never have it. If you don't ask, the answer is always no. If you don't step forward, you are always in the same place.

It's hard to really let go of someone who has been a part of who you are. It's hard to accept that when we set them free, we also lose the power to know what is behind their smile, their laughter and their words. We free them from us, only to find out that we haven't freed ourselves from them.

"Ever wonder why people can't fall sanely in love, instead of falling madly in love? But then again, what would be the point?" -- Jessica Zafra

Love is not precisely a feeling. Feelings easily pass and change or fade away. But true love is an act of wanting to continue inspite and despite of everything.

Setting someone free is the hardest thing to do. It's not the tears you cried that makes it so hard, but the small piece of hope left inside your eart that someday, you would still end uo together.

Don't rely on destiny. Rather, we should think of reality. If we really want something, fight for it. Because destiny is just an excuse of letting things happen instead of making things happen.

It's not certain whether the one you have now is the one you'll be with for the rest of your life. There's even no guarantee if the one you just met is the one who will love you forever. Because there's no such thing as the ideal man or woman, no such thing as the right person or the right one. It's us who make love to last a lifetime. So if ever somebody asks you is she or he the right one, you can answer, "I'm not sure, but I intend to make him or her my only one.

To love somebody is so risky and indeed very tiring. Sometimes it seems you've already done everything to the person, but then your existence remains unseen.

Words to live by: If people talk negatively about you, live in such a a way that no one would believe them.

You can truly fall in love with one person. And the others? Well, they just make your heart beat. You'll get to meet a lot of people, but there's only one to whom you'll fully give your heart. Sure, you'll get attracted to many. But what you will have are just feelings. Whether you play around or not, there will only be one perseon for you in the end. It can be hard finding that person and even harder to fill that emotion, but I've been told that it could happen.

In relationships, it is impossible to find someone whol will never hurt you. So go for the one who makes all the pain worth it.

It is one of greatest ironies of human existence that the more you love someone, the more you make yourself vulnerable in the pain of losing them. And the more people you love, the more you increase your chances of getting hurt. Yes, love makes you strong, but at the same time it leaves you defenseless.

When you love someone, you feel like that person becomes a part of you. Like an arm perhaps. So much so that in time, you get so used to their presence that you neglect them thinking they'd never leave. But that's the difference between a limb and someone you love. Neglect as you may with your arm, still, it stays by your side. Do the same to your loved one, and they may never come back. I guess that's why they say say that when someone you love leaves you, it feels like a vital part of you has been torn right off.

We can never be happy with something wrong. But if somewhere along the way, what was wrong has made us happy, then I must have been right all along.

Losing a person you love is hard because you may have given your best thinking it would be your last. Cry if you have to but find sometime to recover. Move on and allow yourself to love again. But in finding love again, remember to always give what's best of you, and not what's left of you.

+ karen +

2006-03-29T12:27:00.000+08:00

This entry is for my beloved RLE 3..

Since my multiply cannot accomodate more than 7 pictures now, I placed small pictures here nalang so that you can still view them. =D ENJOY!

A La Luz Experience..

27.03.06

La Luz Beach Resort

San Juan, Batangas

I really enjoyed our Batangas Trip. =D The pictures from the internet were very deceiving. But then, it's not WHERE YOU ARE right? It's WHO YOU ARE WITH. =D Of all the things that we did, I enjoyed the game, Train, the most. =D I felt like I was in GradeSchool. Super FUN! Thanks Aeron for the very wonderful idea! It's really super memorable. Who can ever forget the jellyfish sa balsa..? Which attacked Topher and Justin.. (yes, i prefer the word attacked than stung.. kase grabe yung damage eh..haha..db guys?) We also played volleyball.. Oh well.. What's new? Pampagulo lang ako dun! Haha! ;) But then I was able to score naman di ba? About 2 points. Haha! What else? Oh.. the "1,2,3 Pass" and Truth or Dare!! Crucial.. Haha.. R18 yung kina Jus, Jaymee and Ria. Haha! I also enjoyed our picture takings.. =D Especially on that huge rock! It was totally alluring! ;) And.. Oh so kilig! Haha! Kidding! Basta.. Super FUN! =D On our way home, we had a stop over somewhere in Laguna, super NOSEBLEED talaga si Jus!! As in! D ba Aeron? Haha! TOURISTER.. yeah! FUN FUN FUN! So that would be all for now.. GONNA MISS YOU GUYS.. SO MUCH.. 'til then! ;)

Ria: Bestfriend! Thanks for spending the entire day with me honey. =D Super enjoy, db? Worth it, sobra? hehe!

Katey: Partner! Thank you so much for the pictures! Grabe. Super enjoy! Can't get over! Pero di ka parin umamin ha? Haha.. Just kidding! =D I enjoyed our conversation about love, life and friendship.. =D Ginulat lang tayo ni Topher! Sayang! Hindi natapos! Haha! =D

Justin: Tourister! Thanks for the ride and for being SOOO bait 3x! Haha! Binilang ko talaga yun! Haha! Joke! Thanks at hindi tayo nag-away sa La Luz. Haha! Himala? ;)

Topher: Chest tube drainage! Thanks for being SOOO nice! Super gentleman mo! Your girl is so lucky to have you.. super! Haha! How's your back? Hehe! Sa super gentleman, yan tuloy.. hehe.. ;)

Jaymee: Thanks at nakasama ka sa La Luz.. ;) Sayang hindi na tayo nakapag overnight sa house ng uncle mo.. dbale, next time nalang ulit! ;)

Kris: F.O.! Haha! Thanks at nakasama ka din! Super benta yung ginawa mo nung makita mo yung van! Haha! ;) Hope nag enjoy ka.. ;) Ang funny ng mga pose natin sa digi cam! haha!

Aeron: My beloved playmate! Thanks sa QT pag uwi.. haha! Kahit wala tayong QT sa La Luz.. okay na din yung sa van! *Sorry, Kate! Haha!* Thanks sa pillows and sa lap! Crucial! Dami chismis! Haha! Sa uulitin ah? Oh btw, wag ng matigas ang ulo! Sabi ng wag uuwi sa Bulacan ng gabi eh! Haha!

RLE 3.. Don't forget the pact we made a? ;)

+ karen +

2006-03-27T14:45:00.000+08:00

The seventh commandment, "Thou shall not steal," has been totally violated by someone along Dapitan St. at exactly 11 in the morning. He was riding a motorcycle when he stole the cell phone of an unknown citizen. I was there, saw the whole scenario, and it really pains me when all I was able to do was STARE. Just stare. I pity the young lady because she really looked helpless, screaming on top of her voice, yet amidst the large number of people around her, no one had the guts to defend her or even tried to follow the thief and do something about it. I just can't think of a valid reason why people steal. Is it because of poverty? Well, even if that's the reason why some people do it, it is STILL not a VALID reason to do such thing. Stealing should NEVER be an option. Haay. There are still a lot more alternatives to overcme poverty. Oh well.

Moving on, we went to Glorietta and GB3 a while ago to help my sister look for a graduation dress. I was able to find the close-to-perfect-dress for her at Rustan's. But then, she didn't like it so much. Aaaw. Too bad. It was a really sexy attire pa naman. Hehe. Hmm.. There were a lot of pretty miniskirts at Zara. While I was there, I was like, "I like this one, I also like that one, and also that one!" Haha.. Super dami! What else? Last night nga pala, we went to Galleria to accompany my sister. I saw a new pair of Havaianas which was really striking! But then, I had to control myself from buying another pair again. Oh well. Next time.. after Batangas. Haha. ;) Watched two movies straight. Just Like Heaven and Ella Enchanted. I just love JUST LIKE HEAVEN. Very beautiful! ;)

Anyway, tomorrow will be the BIG EVENT. Haha. I just hope that we will all be happy, and we will all be able to spend the whole day just knowing each other more, and hopefully.. no secrets will be revealed. Haha. di ba, Aeron? Hmm.. Crucial. So there. Gotta go.. Have to watch Bianca and Zanjoe pa.. haha! I'm a big fan of their loveteam.. Really! Haha.. 'til then. ;)

I MISS YOU BABY..

Just let it die

With no goodbyes

Details don't matter

We both paid the price

Tears in my eyes

You know sometimes

It'd be like that baby

Now everytime I see you

I pretend I'm fine

When I wanna reach out to you

But I turn and I walk and I let it ride

Baby I must confess

We were bigger than anything

Remember us at our best

So I hope this will remind you

When it's for real, it's forever

So don't forget about us
..

just a thought:

..if God can forgive.. why can't he?..

+ karen +